HOW TO DEVELOP YOUR RELATIONSHIP SKILLS
HOW WE DEFINE JOY AND HOW WE DEFINE HUMILITY:
WHY SOME PEOPLE HAVE A HARD TIME AT DOING RELATIONSHIPS:
HOW THESE LACKING RELATIONSHIP SKILLS CAN BE CORRECTED:
Over the next few weeks we continue build on the foundation of knowing God which leads to building more joyous relationships with others. If this is something that you want to improve, remember, it begins with humbling yourself.
Amen.
Your Pastor,
Andrew
Let me know what you think below in the comment section and feel free to share this someone who might benefit from this Pastor’s Desk.
Being a pastor is probably the greatest job in the world. This is especially true when a pastor is blessed with a loving, Christ-centred, Word-hungry, Spirit-filled church - like the one I pastor. And this privileged job comes with some incredible opportunities to grow in some challenging ways. I get to hear people's stories. I have the sacred trust of stewarding people's souls and it's in their souls that some of the most passionate dramas are played out! These experiences have helped me to learn how to care, how to listen, but most importantly how to begin to understand another person. Against this backdrop, I occasionally see others who don't enjoy this privilege and end up creating utterly avoidable conflict. I want to share with you (what now draws on the learning of several decades of experience) some things I have learned about other people.
"Shall your brothers go to the war while you sit here?" Before they had even finished explaining to Moses what their intention was, Moses had alreadyassumed it! But incorrectly! Of course, Moses is not the only one to do this. Weall do it all the time. We hear half of the story. We think we heard their story. Worse still, we think we already know what their story is - and we haven't even heard it yet! When some of the clans of Gad and Rueben came to Moses to ask for pasture and home land on the east of the Jordan, he assumed that they were saying, "We don't want to be a part of this nation anymore." Eventually, after Moses calmed down, they were able to clarify with him that this was notwhat they were saying at all. But a generation later, Moses' successors hadn't learnt the lesson either...
When these clans from Gad, Manasseh, and Rueben decided to build a memorial altar, their countrymen assumed that they had set up an illegal sacrificial altar, and prepared to muster their battled-hardened troops to take action again those east of the Jordan. This is an all-too-common type of reaction by those who assume rather than understand. When people jump to conclusions about what they think someone else's motives are, the end result is more often than not and fractured relationship and hurt. It wasn't until the Promise-Land-Israelites actually talked with - and heard - their East-of-the-Jordan brothers that this potential dispute was diffused. 
Have you ever watched one of those "talent" search TV shows where someone who is convinced they are a world-class singer gets their big break to sing to the world and when they do, despite the desire and determination to be a pop-star, they obviously can't sing?!
Some people are convinced that they are good (even great) at something (such as singing) when, in fact, they are not. I suspect that some people, not wishing to offend, will simply tell someone what they want to hear becuase they want to encourage them. I love people like this! They are encouragers through and through. Thank God for them. I suspect that there are some other people who form a judgment about someone's lack of ability and say nothing. These people are not naturally encouragers but neither are they liars - they can't tell someone they are good at something they are clearly not. Then I suspect that there are some people who just tell it like it is. Their primary motivation is to be truthful - not to be encouraging or even caring.