SCARED, SCARRED, SACRED

SCARED, SCARRED, SACRED

Tom Hanks is everyone’s favourite actor and I’d like to apologise to him from the outset for distorting one of his most famous and frequently quoted lines –   ‘Australia, we have a problem!’ But I think Tom (as he insists on me calling him) wouldn’t mind once he found out the gravity of the problem that Australia is facing. This problem has been front and centre of Australia’s attention for the past few weeks and while all of the attention has been on the seedy side of Canberra, it was a brave Tasmanian girl, Grace Tame, who set the ball rolling. The shameful scandal over the sexual abuse of the former Parliamentary intern Brittany Higgins may have given some the impression that Canberra has a problem, but the truth is that Australia has a problem, and since this year’s Australian of the Year was announced, we here in Tasmania can no longer deny that the problem is actually rife in our state as well!

  

WOMEN’S GREATEST FEAR

Brittany Higgins’ resolve to seek justice for what happened to her and the way she was treated was spurred on after Grace Tame, herself a survivor of predatory sexual abuse, took up the cause of many other women in a similar situation to her where the legal system seemed to protect the perpetrator and offer no such similar rights to the abused. On the morning of the Prime Minister’s response to the scandal of what had happened to Brittany Higgins broke, the ABC TV News Channel interviewed a woman who was a former lawyer-turned-Canberra-journalist who described her time in the Parliament House Press Gallery where she repeatedly endured inappropriate sexual harassment (which included inappropriate touching and lewdness) during her time there, and, she said, to her shame, that did not report it. Eventually, she too suffered what women fear most. She is now a women’s rights campaigner.

In that interview she said that the problem was that men wrongly viewed sex only on a purely physical level which in their minds has very little consequence beyond the momentary physical encounter. She went on to say that most men do not understand what really happens when they sexually assault a woman. There was, she said, a starkly different reality for women who endured unwanted sexual violation from a man. This stark difference between the viewpoint of men and women was borne out in what men and women fear most. According to her, all of the surveys of what women fear most reveal the same thing: the fear of being raped. Men’s greatest fear, on the other hand, was the fear of being humiliated. She explained that rape was not just a violation of a woman, it was a “breaking” of a woman. It leaves her broken. I was fascinated that she chose to use this word to describe what happened to a woman’s soul as a result of rape.

Former Liberal prime minister Malcolm Turnbull said the place [Parliament] thrives on disrespect for women and compared it to corporate culture in the 1970s.
Sydney Morning Herald, February 19, 2021

Our western legal system is largely based on the Judeo-Christian moral code (or at least it used to be). The protection of women was enshrined into that code and the rape of a woman was equated to the capital crime of murder.

¶ “But if the man meets the [engaged] woman out in the country, and he rapes her, then only the man must die. Do nothing to the young woman; she has committed no crime worthy of death. She is as innocent as a murder victim.
Deuteronomy 22:25-26 NLT

It is a sad reality that women are routinely objectified by men (treated like sexual objects for their gratification) rather than treated as human beings worthy of respect. This is one of the reasons why we can no longer as a society regard ‘porn’ as an “industry” — then deceptively describe it with the euphemism (the art of using nice words to describe something horrible in order to trick people into thinking it as a good thing) that it “empowers women.”

You might remember that when Playboy Magazine founder Hugh Hefner died he was widely described in the media as someone who empowered and helped to liberate women, when what these confused journalists should have said was that he objectified women for the gratification of men and in the process robbed them of something sacred! I recently asked a female lawyer how I as a pastor should go about addressing this problem, she said, “Teach men about biblical manhood—how to properly treat women!” So here I go.

[Treat] older women as mothers, younger women as sisters, in all purity.
First Timothy 5:2

 

I MEAN BE A MAN, NOT A MEAN MAN

Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.
Matthew 11:29

I was told recently that the term gentleman referred to a man of substantial means. The Oxford dictionary seems to confirm this definition, but it also states that a gentleman is “a chivalrous, courteous, or honourable man.” The word chivalrous isn’t used very often today, but I hope that after men have read this pastor’s desk article this adjective might be heard more often. To be chivalrous is to be “courteous and gallant, especially towards women (typically used of a man or his behaviour).” It is a word that describes a man’s respectful and kind treatment of women. It is therefore a word that we should hope to hear used more often. The best example of a chivalrous man is Jesus of Nazareth. Women felt safe around Jesus. Jesus never hit a woman. When alone with a woman in a private setting (note John 4 where Jesus was alone with the Samaritan women at the well), Jesus never did anything inappropriate. 

¶ Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her, that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that He might present the church to Himself in splendour, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.
Ephesians 5:25-27

A chivalrous man protects women. A man who truly loves a woman will patiently listen to her and give her his attention. 

 

A SCARRED WOMAN

Broken women are inevitably scarred and also invisibly scarred. Men have an odd appreciation for scars. Women don’t. Many women who have experienced the humiliation of scarring will use different forms of ‘make-up’ to cover and hide their scars including personality make-up, hairstyle make-up, fashion make-up, and even cosmetic make-up.  

A glad heart makes a cheerful face, but by sorrow of heart the spirit is crushed.
Proverbs 15:13

Some men seem to be able to sense a scarred women and for some despicable reason see them as fair-game. Jesus didn’t. It is my hope that every man who might be disposed this way will accept the challenge to repent, change their view of such women, and learn how to be sensitive to her.  

And there was a woman who had had a discharge of blood for twelve years, and who had suffered much under many physicians, and had spent all that she had, and was no better but rather grew worse. She had heard the reports about Jesus and came up behind Him in the crowd and touched His garment. For she said, “If I touch even His garments, I will be made well.” And immediately the flow of blood dried up, and she felt in her body that she was healed of her disease. And Jesus, perceiving in Himself that power had gone out from Him, immediately turned about in the crowd and said, “Who touched My garments?” And His disciples said to Him, “You see the crowd pressing around you, and yet you say, ‘Who touched Me?’” And He looked around to see who had done it. But the woman, knowing what had happened to her, came in fear and trembling and fell down before Him and told Him the whole truth. And He said to her, “Daughter, your faith has made you well; go in peace, and be healed of your disease.”
Mark 5:25-34

 

THE SACRED INVITATION

Australia — Tasmania — we have a problem. The rate of sexual assault in my home state is unacceptable. It is sad to hear that the problem has become so prevalent in some parts of our state that some Tasmanian communities have had to establish their own community based sexual assault support services, such as in Geeveston (which has a population of 616). But there is a solution.

If what I have shared sounds like pious moralising then I have failed in my attempt to persuade men that women should not be considered as objects. If to those who have endured their worst fear I have sounded like an out-of-touch just-get-over-it ignorant male, then again I have failed. The pain – the brokenness – is real. What I hope to have made clear is that what has been happening in Australia’s Parliament House behind closed doors is not isolated or restricted to Canberra. Spend a day in any Magistrate’s Court during an open sitting and you too will begin to realise the extent of Australia’s problem. It is a cultural problem that effects millions of homes across Australia and therefore thousands of homes across Tasmania. 

WHERE WE MUST START

It is my hope that all men who know and have surrendered to Christ will commit to helping their local church community to become a sacred space where the scared find sanctuary, and the scarred find soothing. The gospel of Christ offers hope and healing for those who have been traumatised and betrayed. It offers the hope of a new start, a new beginning — not just as the moment of conversion — but any moment that a child of God cries out to their Heavenly Father. Salvation, or deliverance, is available to the son or daughter of God any time they call on the name of the Lord — especially when they have been wounded.

For “everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved [rescued].”
Romans 10:13

If you are a woman who has been scarred, the Spirit invites you to come into the Father’s sacred place by simply calling on the Father (Matt. 7:7). If you are a man who the Spirit is now convicting of your wrong actions or attitudes toward women, then He invites you to come into the sacred place through the door of confession and repentance (1John 1:8-9). And while I hope that each Sunday becomes a safe and sacred place for every man, woman, boy and girl, I also hope that as we continue to build a church without walls, we might imagine that ‘Houston’ might respond to “Jim Lovell” (Tom Hanks) — “We’ve found a solution Jim, a sacred solution, it’s Christ’s redeeming and rescuing and transforming grace that heals, saves, and delivers.” 

 

Your pastor,

Andrew

Let me know what you think below in the comment section and feel free to share this someone who might benefit from this Pastor’s Desk...

LEARNING TO HEAL

LEARNING TO HEAL

If it’s possible to have a favourite chapter of the Bible then Romans chapter 8 is mine. I often think of it as the ‘Treasure Chest’ of Scripture because it is almost of the culmination of God’s revelation of redemption. But it is also confronts the believer with the reality of living in a world where God at times seems distant and life seems unfair. While Romans 8:28, which is perhaps (if I’m allowed to have one) my favourite Bible verse, sounds inspirational, in the context of Romans 8 it is meant as a consolation (or comfort) for the suffering and confused believer who is dealing with disappointment, pain, hurt, mistreatment, and loneliness. If we learn anything at all from Romans 8:20, it is that we live in a world where people hurt, and long for healing. And if we look a little closer at Romans 8 we can see that there is a type of healing that requires learning.

For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of Him who subjected it, in hope
Romans 8:20

FUTILITY

All creation is subject to futility. ‘Futility’ is anything which seems “useless or pointless”. This would include: pain, disease, breakage, loss, decay, injury, malpractice, and the effects of failure (of either procedures or equipment). Futility can result from inclement weather, natural disasters, or inherited genetics. But the worst kind of futility is the kind that is completely avoidable and utterly unnecessary and which is caused by a person needlessly hurting or harming another person. While this kind of hurt may result in physical pain, it nearly always results in an invisible pain called trauma. Trauma causes someone to continually live in the moment of their emotional/soul pain. Pastor Andrew Brunson knows what trauma feels like. He was a missionary in Turkey, one of the world’s least evangelised countries, and had been serving there for over 20 years. Then the Turkish government arrested him on charges of espionage and imprisoned for two years but not before the threat of being imprisoned for life. He suffered greatly during his time in a crowded prison cell which he shared with over 20 ISIS members being held on terrorism charges. One year after his release, he still has trouble eating and sleeping. He was tested for Post-Traumatic-Stress-Disorder after struggling for months after his release, but was eventually diagnosed with Post-Traumatic Stress instead. 

Even in laughter the heart may ache,
and the end of joy may be grief.
Proverbs 14:13

Pastor Andrew Brunson (centre of the picture), missionary to Turkey, was imprisoned by the Turkish government for 2 years and released October 2018

This invisible pain impacts how a person thinks and ends up distorting their soul – which cripples them emotionally. Someone with a distorted soul can look ‘happy’ on the outside but be aching on the inside. Because of the trauma they are suffering, their soul may have become distorted with misplaced guilt — where, despite being the victim, they are made to guilty for the abuse they have suffered by their abuser(!); or, unreasonable regret cripples them psychologically (“If only I’d…”) – which causes them to live disconnected from others and often leads them to always be disappointed in people generally. Such hurting people often become depressed and bitter and engage in unreasonable blame-shifting. These unchecked symptoms of trauma then become a downward spiral.

Pastor Rick and Kay Warren

A glad heart makes a cheerful face,
but by sorrow of heart the spirit is crushed.
Proverbs 15:13

The good news for anyone suffering from the pain of trauma is that there is a road to recovery and that many of the road markers toward their healing are to be found in Romans 8. Just ask Kay Warren, the wife of mega-church pastor, Rick Warren. Thirty-four years after her sexual abuse as a 6-year old girl, the effects of the trauma she had suffered for so long could no longer be denied or ignored. It crippled her and nearly ruined her marriage to Rick. She, and Rick, underwent three double therapist sessions per week for a number of years before her healing began. It was then that the statement, “It’s not your fault!” finally sunk in. It was then that the Scriptures in Romans 8 describing Christ bearing our guilt and shame finally sunk in.

He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the One who died—more than that, who was raised—who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us.
Romans 8:32, 34

HOW JESUS HEALED

It seems that most of the people Jesus healed were miraculously healed (that is, it could not have happened naturally) and that their healing was also instantaneous.

how God anointed Jesus of Nazareth with the Holy Spirit and with power. He went about doing good and healing all who were oppressed by the devil, for God was with Him.
Acts 10:38

Sometimes Jesus would heal people by touching them.

Then Jesus laid his hands on His eyes again; and He opened his eyes, his sight was restored, and he saw everything clearly.
Mark 8:25

Sometimes Jesus would heal people by speaking to them.

Then He said to the man, “Stretch out your hand.” And the man stretched it out, and it was restored, healthy like the other.
Matthew 12:13

Jesus said to him, “Get up, take up your bed, and walk.” And at once the man was healed, and he took up his bed and walked. ¶ Now that day was the Sabbath.
John 5:8-9

Sometimes Jesus would heal people by looking at them as they looked at Him.

When Jesus saw her, He called her over and said to her, “Woman, you are freed from your disability.”
Luke 13:12

But not all of Christ’s miracles of healing were instantaneous. In the odd account of one blind man, Jesus progressively healed this man from his blindness (Mark 8:22-25). There are several possible things we learn from this account which at least includes the possibility that God sometimes deems it necessary not to heal instantaneously, but to outwork His healing grace over time. 

HEALING OF A WOUNDED SOUL SOMETIMES TAKES TIME

Kay Warren describes the wound she experienced as a 6-year old being sexually molested as always being there. This is one of the traits of trauma. Unlike breaking an arm or leg, she said, where the cast comes off and the bone has been reset and healed, the wounds that inflict a person’s soul, such as the abuse she suffered, do not have a ‘cast’ that can come off to mark the time of its healing. This is a common and frustrating experience for those whose souls have been wounded. Just when they think they have “moved on”, something triggers the trauma and they spiral down again. For Kay Warren, this was very confusing and after Christian counselling and therapy she now describes her ‘healing’ as incomplete until the Resurrection. Some wounds leave painful scars. 

An understanding of the insights gained from Romans 8 about the kind of pain people suffer over a lifetime reveals several important truths that can help anyone who would welcome even the kind of ‘partial’ healing that Kay Warren has now experienced.

HEALING FROM LEARNING

Misplaced and unrealistic expectations about healing can actually add to a sufferer’s pain. But from Romans 8 we can see that by learning its truths we can learn to be ‘healed’:

1.  This world itself is wounded by sin and those afflicted by the hurt of sin will perpetuate this hurt in others (Rom. 8:20).
2.  Christ by the Holy Spirit empathises and intercedes for those who hurt (Rom. 8:26-27).
3.  God is able to redeem pain, hurt, and injury (Rom. 8:28).
4.  In this life we can only ever experience partial and temporal healing—or ultimate healing will come in the Resurrection (Rom. 8:23).
5.  We worship, serve, follow and emulate a Saviour who suffered (Rom. 8:29).
6.  God’s love is outpoured on us even when we don’t receive the healing we long for in this life (Rom. 8:35-39).

As we continue to reach out to those in our world, we will increasingly be ministering to hurting, lost, lonely, wounded people. May God grant us the grace to minister His healing love to them.

-Pastor Andrew

Terminally ILL Girl Changes Her Mind About Wanting To Die

A terminally ill British teenager who demanded the right to die has suddenly changed her mind.

Hannah Jones, 14, has put her name back on the transplant list for a donor heart, eight months after rejecting the offer of a new heart.

The teenager originally turned down the new organ because she believed she had already suffered "too much trauma" following a battle with cancer that left her with a heart defect. But after suffering partial kidney failure nine days ago, Hannah has now agreed to the surgery after being informed that she cannot receive dialysis until she receives the heart.
[Read]