WHAT CHARMING BUT VIOLENT BETRAYERS DESERVE

 AUSTRALIA’S NATIONAL CRISIS

Australia is now grappling with a national crisis — the violent abuse of women by men. Every four days in Australia a woman is being murdered [Source]. The sad probability is that she was murdered by “a current or former intimate partner” [Source]. But added to this alarming statistic is the even greater and more horrifying statistic of number of women who are experiencing abuse – physical; sexual; verbal; financial; psychological – daily. In fact, it is so prevalent that most people working in this arena know that most domestic abuse incidents in Australia are not reported. Abuse is oppression. And since the Bible is so clear and consistent in its condemnation of oppression of the vulnerable you would naturally assume that this national crisis was being thundered and denounced as a great evil from the majority of pulpits around our country at the moment. This assumption is further reinforced by the guesstimate that one-in-four women in every Australian church is regularly abused in some way by a man. But I suspect that it is not. While the Albanese Government’s announcement this week that will commit $925 million to combatting “gender-based violence” is laudable, if the history of attempting to resolve this crisis is any indication of its future success, it is likely to achieve little. Why don’t these expensive government responses work? What can be actually be done with historical support for its success? What, or who, needs to change in order to solve this national crisis? How should Christians and particularly church leaders respond to this crisis? And what does the ancient wisdom of King David’s Psalmic literature give a template for a proven model for societal transformation benefiting the fatherless and single mothers, and women in general?     

FAILED REMEDIES

In Prof. Nancy Pearcey’s book, The Toxic War on Masculinity, she highlights the research which shows that most government behavioural-change programs do not solve the root cause of male abuse of women.

“What is the root cause of domestic violence, then? People who work with abusive men say the cause is a particular belief system—and these men will not change their behaviour until they change their beliefs.”
Nancy Pearcey. The Toxic War on Masculinity: How Christianity Reconciles the Sexes (p. 239). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

This is why most programs to ‘reform’ abusive men, do not work – unless it changes their beliefs about the value of women. Interestingly, based on one of the largest studies of its kind, Pearcey reports, of the three groups of men surveyed (secular, nominal Christians, and regular-church-goers) by far the least likely to abuse women were the committed regular-church-going Christian men (p. 14-15).

Many people assume that most theologically conservative men are patriarchal and domineering. But sociological studies have refuted that negative stereotype. Compared to secular men, devout Christian family men who attend church regularly are more loving husbands and more engaged fathers. They have the lowest rates of divorce. And astonishingly, they have the lowest rate of domestic violence of any major group in America (chapters 2 and 3). This research is largely unknown, and even Christians are surprised to learn about it. The evidence shows that Christianity has the power to overcome toxic behaviour in men and reconcile the sexes—an unexpected finding that has stood up to rigorous empirical testing.
Pearcey, Nancy. The Toxic War on Masculinity: How Christianity Reconciles the Sexes (pp. 14-15). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Of all the solutions offered by governments to deter oppressive male abuse of women, prison is by far the least effective. My discussion with a defence lawyer this week confirmed what most of us suspect. If you put an abuse man in a prison with dozens of other abusive men who demean women that man is likely to imbibe even greater abusive tendencies! 

 

WHAT (OR WHO) NEEDS TO CHANGE?

The former Victorian Police Commissioner, Christine Nixon, and Professor Kate Fitz-Gibbon (University of Melbourne, School of Law), wrote in The Age last week (April 27, 2024) that what needs to change in Australia is men’s beliefs about women. The secular script that men are indoctrinated with through the sexualisation of women in advertising, Hollywood, and the so-called multi-trillion dollar “Porn Industry” must be exposed as fuelling an evil attitude in men about women. We can no longer ignore that around 90% of gender violence involves men abusing women. Prof. Pearcey points out that in the rare cases where it is a woman abusing a man it is commonly an act of self-defence.

Who needs to change? I am suggesting that Australian male pastors need to change. I would urge my pastoral fraternity to recognise that we must do what we can to model, teach, rebuke, exhort, and correct the men in our pews about their attitudes toward women by highlighting how our Lord Jesus the Christ was the Archetypal (the True) man to whom all men should aspire to resemble. Note the following facts about the Christ:

• He protected women against the violence of men (John 8:2-11).
• He never raised His voice to a woman (Isa. 42:2).
• He would not treat a woman as an object of sexual gratification (Matt. 15:19).
• He chose women to accompany Him and His disciples under His guardianship (Matt. 27:55).
• He ordained that it should be a woman to be the one honoured with making the announcement that He was risen from the dead (Luke 24:1-10).

Jesus did more for the dignity of woman than anyone else ever did!  

 

WHAT DOES THE ANCIENT WISDOM OF KING DAVID’S PSALMIC LITERATURE CONTRIBUTE TO SOLVING THIS CRISIS?

I encourage you to read Psalm 55 written by King David. He knew what it was to be confronted as the leader of a nation with a national crisis where violence and strife (Ps. 55:9) was rampant and the vulnerable were being oppressed, ruined, and defrauded (Ps. 55:11). To his horror, much of this oppression and abuse was being carried by men whom he had thought were his trusted friends (Ps. 55:12). In a passage eerily prophetic of what Jesus would experience from one of His most trusted followers (Matt. 10:4; 27:3), King David was shocked as to who his betrayer and underminer was (Ps. 55:13-15). After all, this man was charming. He had many friends. He was well-spoken of by all (Ps. 55:20). “His speech was smooth as butter – soften than oil” (Ps. 55:21) David sighs, “yet war was in his heart” where “he harbors animosity in his heart” (Ps. 55:21 NET). In her book, Prof. Pearcey gives example after example of women who were being abused by their husbands and went to their pastor and elders in desperation for help, only to be told that she was lying about her husband being an abuser. It seems that King David was not only one who was charmed by a man who could present himself as a sweet, charming, gentle and godly man – all the while, and secretly, living a double life in his home as an abuser of the one/s he was supposed to be loving, protecting and providing for. It was from King David’s own experience that he could say to the single mother and the fatherless the beautiful words of Psalm 55:22. What do these charming male betrayers deserve according to King David? Certainly not a godly wife who tolerates her husband’s secretive ungodly behaviour! If you to read what King David thought, then check out his extremely strong imprecatory words in Psalm 55:23. This should help us to understand just how seriously GOD feels about those who abuse women and children.

As I prepare to conclude my pastoral ministry at Legana I have endeavoured to foster an emerging generation of young men who will not model their manhood on the secular cultural script of a man is, but will, instead, chose to be counter-cultural and model their manhood on the traits of Jesus Christ found in the Gospels. And perhaps it is this small initiative of ours that will set an example for other young men to follow as well. It is my pastoral prayer for our church that no woman would experience verbal, physical, sexual, emotional, psychological, financial, abuse from her husband; and, that the men of our church would model their manhood on the person of Jesus of Nazareth. In fact, this is my prayer for our nation!

Your Pastor,

Andrew

Let me know what you think below in the comment section and feel free to share this someone who might benefit from this Pastor’s Desk.

The Media Have Their Guns Aimed At The Church And We Keep Giving Them The Bullets!

BOARD SAFE

Pay careful attention to yourselves and to all the flock, in which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers, to care for the church of God, which He obtained with His own blood. I know that after my departure fierce wolves will come in among you, not sparing the flock; and from among your own selves will arise men speaking twisted things, to draw away the disciples after them.
Acts 20:28-30

This week I took a call from another pastor who expressed concern that the Church was coming under an increasing number of  attacks in the media over the last few weeks. Nearly every night this week on prime-time TV, there has been a damaging report on the state of the Church. On Monday night Four Corners aired a damning report on the Roman Catholic diocese of Philadelphia’s appalling handling of pedophilia committed by priests. A Current Affair, Today Tonight, have each exposed financial and psychological abuse of vulnerable people. On Tuesday night, The 7:30 Report presented a sickening exposé on how domestic violence is rife within the Evangelical and Pentecostal churches in Australia. And this Sunday night, 60 Minutes is reporting on a Baptist church in New South Wales that is in hot water. As I told this fellow pastor, it’s not that the media are attacking us, it’s that they have guns and we keep giving them bullets to fire at us! I want to pastor the kind of church that gives the media reasons to put down their guns. Here’s how we can do it.

A Church Should Be A Safe Refuge

The LORD is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer,
 my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge,
my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.
Psalm 18:2

The Psalmist declared that God was a safe refuge. The church needs to reflect this aspect of God’s character by also being a safe refuge. We want broken, hurting, damaged, lost and confused people to have good reason to feel safe when they come into our church on a Sunday. We do not want our message to sound like an attack on anyone – most especially, the vulnerable. For those who have observed us over the years, it has soon become evident that we help all-comers. On the occasions when I have been publicly attacked by someone opposed to Christianity, I have tried to engage with them which has often led to face-to-face meetings where I have heard their stories and listened to their pain. In nearly every instance this has ended amicably. When issues have arisen in the public arena we have used our profile and platform to contribute into the debate. (People still talk to me about our role in the Tamar Valley Pulp Mill development saga.) Of late, we have been quite outspoken about domestic violence and the sexual abuse of children. In each of our services we present God’s Word without shouting, screaming, or ranting, and while we always try to persuade people that the God of the Bible is worth trusting and that His offer of forgiveness is worth accepting, we do so in a way that people are free to choose to accept it, reject it, or come back and hear more. 

A Church Board Should Ensure Safeness 

But all things should be done decently and in order.
First Corinthians 14:40

The Board of our church takes our responsibility to safeguard the welfare of those who enter into our community very seriously. We have installed video security cameras throughout our buildings and facilities. We are rolling out movement sensor lights around our facilities. We are replacing solid wooden doors with glass doors. We have mandated that every leader undertake Childsafe® training to be aware how to prevent, detect, or best deal with the abuse of children. We now require that everyone who serves on our rosters undertakes our Partnership course so that we can ensure that no-one in our church is put at risk and that we can vouch for everyone who serves in our church.

And God has appointed in the church first apostles, second prophets, third teachers, then miracles, then gifts of healing, helping, administrating, and various kinds of tongues.
First Corinthians 12:28

Local churches are designed by Christ to governed by divinely appointed, spiritually gifted, competent, elders and deacons. Elders govern the spiritual climate and health of a church. They are required by Scripture to be people of exemplary character and spiritual discipline (1Tim. 3:1-7). They do this prayerfully through teaching, preaching, and counsel. Deacons are required to administer the affairs of the church – property and finance management, regulatory compliance, staffing, discipline and development of leaders and ensuring that policies and procedures are adhered to (1Cor. 3:8-13). We don’t necessarily call each one who serves in this administration capacity a ‘deacon’ (which means servant), but those who serve on our church Board fulfil this Christ-ordained appointment for the welfare of His Church.

Paul and Timothy, servants of Christ Jesus, ¶ To all the saints in Christ Jesus who are at Philippi, with the overseers and deacons:
Philippians 1:1

Not Just About ‘Souls’

¶ Beloved, I pray that all may go well with you and that you may be in good health, as it goes well with your soul.
Third John 2

The extent to how much we care about people is not limited to their involvement on a Sunday. We want children to be safe in their homes. We want wives to be safe in their homes. We want husbands to be safe to be around. We hope that the peace people experience on a Sunday from being with God’s people in God’s presence is transferred into their lives and their homes. We hope that our worship of our Servant-Saviour translates into each of us increasingly developing a servant attitude toward those we live with, work with, learn with, and play with. 

We will continue to strive to provide care for the hurting, assist the needy, counsel the troubled, train new leaders, and equip believers to be better ambassadors for Christ in their homes, schools, workplaces and clubs. Thus, for us, it’s not just a motto, it’s our public mission statement to be a church that is helping make life better.

Your servant,

Pastor Andrew

WHERE TO MINE IF YOU WANT TRUE RICHES

WHERE TO MINE IF YOU WANT TRUE RICHES 

Great wealth comes from mining. Australia has benefited greatly from its recent mining boom, making us one of the wealthiest nations on earth. Many of Australia’s cities and towns exist because of mining and many of supportive communities have grown as a result. We saw this dramatically a few years ago when the ‘Beaconsfield Mine Disaster’ happened just a few minutes up the road from where our church is and how it affected our community. Of course, without mining, we could not have our precious technology which depend upon the silicon, copper, bauxite, neodymium, gold, and silver being mined. The world owes a lot to mining. Mining is a primary industry. So is farming. But farming has one massive advantage over mining. And curiously enough, I’ve noticed that the farming versus mining disparity not only applies to primary industries but even more aptly to our relationships.  

When I was growing up, nearly all of my uncles (with the exception of just one of the six), was a farmer. Dairy, beef, crops, sheep, and bees were their livelihoods. The thing about farmers is that they are dependent on sustaining their livelihoods. Miners, on the other hand, cannot sustain their supply of what they mine. Once it’s mined, it’s gone

If you drive around Tasmania you’ll see what appear to be roadside forests. But upon closer inspection, there’s something a little odd about these roadside forests: all the trees are in straight rows. As any local can tell you, there’s a reason for that. These aren’t really forests. They’re plantations. Many of them were planted ten or fifteen years ago, some even sooner. Some harvests in life take that long.

Let me jump straight to my concluding point. If we ‘mine’ those around us – especially those closest to us – we are treating them as if they are expendable, something to be tossed aside when we’re finished with them. But if we farm our relationships, we grow them and they are not only enlarged they are sustained. This means: the one who loves best loves the most for the longest. The husband who treats his wife as an object is not farming. He is mining. And because of his neglect he is the one who is depriving himself of some of the richest blessings this life offers.

¶ The LORD God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to work it and keep it.
Genesis 2:15

The very first wedding took place in a garden. The symbolism is rich. The original picture takes place in an environment where there has been planning, planting, cultivation, tending, watering and feeding. Marriage began in a garden and, in many respects, is a garden. In the Song of Solomon the love between a husband and his wife is described as being like the relationship between a gardener and a garden. 

¶ Awake, O north wind,
and come, O south wind!
Blow upon my garden,
let its spices flow.
Let my beloved come to his garden,
and eat its choicest fruits.
Song of Solomon 4:16

Farming involves tending, sowing, nurturing, watering, and feeding. To reap a harvest of intimacy you must sow trust and fertilise it with consistency and mulch it with understanding and transparency. This type of farming produces bountiful harvests. This is the essence of being faithful in marriage. The boy who learns to go off partying with his mates looking to ‘pick up’ a girl for a cheap thrill is learning to treat women as objects to be be ‘mined’. No woman deserves to be treated like this! This is why pornography is so insidiously evil and grossly unjust! But the boy who is taught that women are a treasure to be prized, guarded, and respected is learning how to farm for the day when his future love is in his life so that he will reap a life-time-together harvest. This is why “dating” (where there is no realistic expectation that it will lead to marriage) is not really a Biblical concept. Rather, the Biblical prescription seems to be friendship within community leading to a courtship with the permission of relevant authorities within that community (particularly parental approval). Parents play a key role in helping their children to relationally ‘farm’ their love for another.

OUR RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD

Our relationship with God though, has parallels with both mining and farming. Some people inflect a deprived spiritual childhood upon themselves by only ever raking the surface of a relationship with God. If only they would dig like a miner! The treasures they would find! Raking, at best, can summon leaves, twigs, and dirt. But digging can be the means by which one discovers gold, gems, precious metals, and even life-sustaining water. 

¶ My son, if you receive my words and treasure up my commandments with you…if you seek it like silver and search for it as for hidden treasures,
Proverb 2:1, 4

The only difference between natural and supernatural mining is that the metals and gems of earth are finite and limited, where as the treasures to found in a relationship with Christ are unlimited and infinite or to use the language of The Mine, they are unsearchable! 

¶ Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgments and how inscrutable his ways!
Romans 11:33

to preach to the Gentiles the unsearchable riches of Christ,
Ephesians 3:8b

And our relationship with God is also a farming one. He is the Gardener who plans, plants, tends, prunes, waters, feeds and harvests. 

“I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit.”
John 15:1-2

The Milky Way clearly visible over my house from my backyard. This is yet another example of the incredible riches that are often ours for the taking but yet go unnoticed and ignored.

But God is also a limitlessly fertile field into whom we can sow our time, talent and treasure. 

Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap. For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life.
Galatians 6:7-8

In one sense, our devotion to God by Scripture reading, study, and memorisation, is mining our relationship with God while our good deeds including prayer, worship, witnessing, serving the Body of Christ, is farming our relationship with God. Australia’s wealth has been based on farming and mining. Even with all the high-tech advances in the global economy, people are always going to what mining and farming give us. While ‘mining’ has no place in our relationships with each other, especially for those who are married, it can and should share the basis of our relationship with God along with ‘farming’. After you finish reading these few brief thoughts, I invite you to begin ‘mining’ your relationship with God through the reading of Scripture and to make a commitment to spiritually ‘farm’ your relationship with God as well by sowing good deeds in the Name of Christ.

¶ The point is this: whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows bountifully will also reap bountifully …  ¶ He who supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will supply and multiply your seed for sowing and increase the harvest of your righteousness.
Second Corinthians 9:6, 10

Your spiritual mining-rights entitlements and harvest awaits.

Amen.

Behind Closed Doors

In the years to come, our society is going to face an alarming crisis. This crisis will impact how nations are governed, business is done, and families are constituted. And the cause of this crisis is happening right now behind closed doors...

I've been helping people now for several decades. In that time I have never met a completely functional person! Initially this somewhat surprised me. After listening to the stories of a few thousand people, I've come to realise that we are all dysfunctional to varying degrees. People who appear competent, relaxed, confident, care-free, rarely are. And increasingly over the last few years I've been noticing a concerning trend. Things that used to constitute 'personal problems' seem to have become somewhat normalised and a whole new set of problems now constitute the issues that too many people are now facing. And for the most part these very complex issues are being endured in silence, behind closed doors.

The family home should be the safest place on earth. It should be the place where we associate words like, security, laughter, fond-memories, healing, and rest. The family home is where mum and dad model love, communication, conflict-resolution, planning, dreaming, and romancing. Mums help make a home. Dads help build a home. Together, a Mum and a Dad indispensably contribute what is necessary to make the difference between a house and a home. Ask any single Mum and she'll tell that you that being a solo parent is an extremely tough gig. Ask any wife how hard it is parenting her children when her husband and father of her children won't step up and accept his responsibility to build character, discipline, and life-skills in their home. And I could go one step further and invite you to talk with the wife of an unworthy husband - who abuses both her and her children. I could go this extra step, but I can't. The reason is, such women are difficult to find - not because there's not plenty of them - but because these women and children generally suffer behind closed doors.

What goes on behind closed doors is more than just a physical matter. It involves the intimidation. It involves deep embarrassment and shame. It involves guilt. Abuse takes on different degrees and forms behind closed doors.

The home is where children ought learn to: serve sacrificially, love lavishly, socialise sensibly, laugh lots, and lead courageously. And the growing dire lack of the fulfilment of this ought has given rise to our looming crisis. We now have children growing up not merely in broken homes, but highly dysfunctional homes where they are subject to emotional, physical, social, spiritual, and, sexual, abuse. We Tasmanians went from stunned shock to appalled disgust when we discovered behind the closed doors of one of our own, the mother of a twelve year old girl had been prostituting her own daughter for the past few years to hundreds of men - including men in Public Office, actually charged with upholding justice! The biggest problem with this case is that it is almost certainly not isolated! There is deep pain being felt and inflicted in many Tasmanian homes behind closed doors.

As the children from these abusive homes become adults and take their place in our society as celebrities, business people, politicians, academics, sports champions, they bring with them more than the pain of their abuse. Unwittingly they also bring to positions of influence a highly dysfunctional concept of normality. They attempt to numb their pain, quiet their pain, deny their pain, distract their pain, amuse their pain, but, all to no avail. And what's worse, a good number of them will perpetuate this generational cycle of abuse behind closed doors.

Jesus stood up and said to her, "Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?"
She said, "No one, Lord." And Jesus said, "Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more."
John 8:10-11

The next time you see someone who deliberately looks different - whether it's their heavy mascara, tattoos, piercings, or Gothic fashion, it might worth considering what kind of home they came from. When you hear someone campaigning for something that would have disgusted a previous generation, consider what pain they might be desperately trying to justify. We shouldn't judge too quickly until we know what happened behind closed doors.

All of this is going to contribute to a crisis that should alarm us. Without homes from which leaders can be born to a Mum and a Dad who can then together distil into them how to love, how to care, how to share, how to learn, how to be courageous, how to be honest (even when it hurts), how to work (even though laziness is way cooler), and how to resolve conflict and get along with hard-to-get-along-with people, we are going to have to deal a social tsunami of the most broken, dysfunctional, narcissistic people in human history. This will impact how the next emerging generation views volunteering for not-for-profits (in addition to their day-jobs), giving to charities, serving within a church, donating their time to help run a board of a community organisation, or becoming a self-funded missionary. Increasingly churches who used to 'disciple' new Christians on a pathway to leadership within their church are going to have to disciple pre-Christians and new-Christians to acquire functional life-skills before embarking on discipling them into becoming leaders. These functional skills will have to include how to be sociable (with real live human beings), how to parent, manage finances, appropriate sexuality, diet, and how to read a book. All the while, we will have to teach, model, and train what a life-giving home is so that the next generation has nothing to fear behind closed doors.

Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.
Titus 2:3-5

And here's my appeal. Open your doors. By 'doors' I don't just mean that thing at the front of your house, I also mean your heart. We have a few young children from broken homes occasionally come and spend a night with us. For just a brief moment they experience an alternate view of 'normal'. While this happens occasionally in our family home, it also happens every week in our church. We welcome it! Please don't be surprised if you meet new people in your church each Sunday whom you soon discover live in very dysfunctional homes. Please don't just welcome them, expect them. And don't just expect them, pray for the Lord to bring them in! When you see a struggling single mum battling with her crying baby, don't be judgmental - instead take a glimpse behind their closed door and reach out to them - let's open our doors to them. 

The Church was originally founded on multitudes of dysfunctional people coming to Christ and being made whole. One of the most compelling statements of this is found in First Corinthians where the Apostle lists the types of broken people who had ventured into the healing community of the church and been made whole. I finish with the Apostle's celebration of broken people - those who had previously suffered behind closed doors - who had now been made whole, in the hope that we too can see the broken, despairing, abused, lonely, hurting, dysfunctional people of our community come to Christ's healing community of the church - a church not behind closed doors!

¶ Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.
First Corinthians 6:9-11

Ps. Andrew