What To Do When Faced With Those Difficulties You Keep Putting Off

TEACH ME

What is the most difficult thing for you to do? If you are not sure you might try asking the same question in a different way. What is it that you really don’t want to ever have to do? What is it that you would much rather have someone else do, than do it yourself? This question is also answered by looking at how we spend our time. Those things which are really difficult for us to do tend to get put down our priority list even though they belong at the top of our priority list. When something is too difficult for me to do I tend to procrastinate attempting it and then treat my lower priorities as more urgent. My procrastinations are an indication of what I find most difficult. This year, I have had to come to terms with my propensity for avoiding the difficult. I needed to learn some things and for this to happen I have had to be taught.

Teach me your way, O LORD, that I may walk in your truth; unite my heart to fear your name.
Psalm 86:11

When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.

God has designed for us to deal with difficulties. God has also designed for us to be taught howto deal with difficulties. During Old Testament times God ordained for leaders to teach. This included priests, elders, kings and parents. In our New Testament times, even with the outpouring of the Holy Spirit – Whom Jesus said would teach, lead, and guide the believer – God has particularly gifted certain people with the primary responsibility of teaching others.

And God has appointed in the church first apostles, second prophets, third teachers…
First Corinthians 12:28

If I was prone to digressing, I would at this point point out that not all those who want to teach, can teach well. I would also point out that just because someone is able to teach about a particular subject, does not mean that they can teach all subjects. But I have been taught not to digress so I will make neither of these points.

The prayer God delights to hear and to answer.

The prayer, “Teach me!” occurs most frequently in the Psalms. Generally the psalmist was seeking to learn the ways of God and to learn how to follow those ways. We might join with the psalmists and pray the same prayer for the same reasons so that we too can know what God’s will for us is and how we can fulfil it. But we might also learn from the psalmists and apply this principle more particularly. There are times in each of our lives where we do not really know what, or more precisely, how to do what needs to be done. My experience and observations inform me that God most usually answers such prayers by sending us a teacher. You should be careful when this happens because sometimes they do not look like a teacher. They might not even be present in the flesh. They might be within the pages of a book, or the screen of a computer, or the voice on a radio or podcast. They may also be right in front of us.

While God has ordained for pastors to teach His unfathomable Word to His people, which may have a lifetime duration, more commonly, the teachers whom God will answer our “Teach me!” prayers are present for a moment, a season, a time. They may teach us directly, or God may even use them inadvertently to teach us indirectly when their mistakes and failings become instructive warnings for us, or perhaps more positively, their lives become a silent example for us. 

I think the most beautiful prayer that ascends into the Throne-Room of Heaven is a “Teach me!” prayer that has been reduced to a one word prayer: “Help!” (At least I hope it is one of the more beautiful prayers to God because I tend to pray that prayer a lot.) Some even pray this one word prayer expecting God to solve all their difficulties without realising that God is answering this prayer differently – as if it was the prayer He delights to answer: “Teach me Oh God.“

¶ Teach me your way, O LORD, and lead me on a level path…
Psalm 27:11

The most difficult things you will have to do will involve your interactions with others. Conflicts, disagreements, misunderstandings, confession, seeking forgiveness, rebuking, managing, and leading difficult people, are chief among the most difficult things you will ever do. Rather than despair; rather than procrastinate; rather than get frustrated; pray the prayer that God delights to hear and then watch carefully how He answers it. 

Amen.

Ps. Andrew

Leaders Are Like Windows

Kim and I rarely fight over anything. The only possible exception to this delightful fact is how we feel about windows. Kim loves to look out through them and see what’s happening outside. Everyone knows that she is very much an outdoors girl. I, on the other hand, like how curtains and blinds give a certain degree of privacy from outside peering eyes. Kim loves how the sun-light radiates warmth and lights up the room she’s in. Whereas I find the glare of direct sunlight difficult. It’s not that I don’t like natural light or even the warmth which comes from the sun’s radiance, it’s that I like how curtains and blinds allow me to control it and protect my privacy. This dilemma between unimpeded windows and curtained windows is like the dilemma that leaders have to navigate. There are times when a leader must either be fully transparent, or partly transparent, or very discreet. How we use windows teaches us some important truths about leadership.

Transparency in leadership is being open and honest. Leaders know that this is necessary for authentic leadership and connecting meaningfully with those who lend them their trust. There are times when it is necessary for a leader to have their curtains wide open, so that people can see in. Wisdom is needed to know when. Wisdom is also needed to know with who to do this. 

And David shepherded them with integrity of heart; with skillful hands he led them.
Psalm 78:72

Conversely, there are times when a leader must draw the curtains a little. A husband and father understands this kind of leadership at those times when their wife and children need reassurance during times of uncertainly and near overwhelming challenges. Then there are times when it is appropriate to close the curtains and either speak privately or not at all.

¶ Now when Jesus heard this, he withdrew from there in a boat to a desolate place by himself. But when the crowds heard it, they followed him on foot from the towns.
Matthew 14:13

But a leader loses their connection with those called to trust them when their windows are forever curtained. But this is frightening process for many leaders (parents, teachers, employers, captains, home-group leaders, pastors, politicians). It means becoming vulnerable as well as transparent. This always tests levels of insecurity. But without doing it a leader loses their authenticity. Good leaders are able to move those who trust them by their words. Great leaders are able to move those who trust them by who they are known to be by those who trust them. King David was certainly a great leader. He knew who to be transparent and vulnerable with his key trusters. But as Nathan the Prophet could have told you, when David didn’t do this, great damage was done (Second Samuel 12).

Why have you despised the word of the LORD, to do what is evil in his sight? You have struck down Uriah the Hittite with the sword and have taken his wife to be your wife and have killed him with the sword of the Ammonites.
Second Samuel 12:9

There are leaders, good leaders, and great leaders. Leaders tend to open their curtains too wide too soon to too many. Great leaders on the other hand open their curtains wide often to One. There is One, the Sovereign Omnipotent Shepherd who is veiled in mystery with Whom we can be totally transparent and open. Many of the Psalms are glimpses into the transparency which leaders gave to their Sovereign Heavenly King of Kings.

Give attention to the sound of my cry,
my King and my God,
for to you do I pray.
Psalm 5:2

Have you opened the curtains to your soul to the One Who sees through them anyway? No matter what challenges, obstacles, difficulties or problems you are facing now, the One Who Sees All sees you and longs for you to open up to Him. In doing so you may discover what I have found that there is great strength imparted simply by being transparent with the Omnipotent Shepherd.

Amen.

THREE KEYS FOR HANDLING OVERWHELMING DIFFICULTIES

WHEN EVERYTHING SEEMS TO BE GOING WRONG

“Everything’s going wrong at the moment!” “Things just couldn’t get worse!” are often sighed by people when they are under pressure. If you find yourself frequently using these expressions, then I want to show you three tools for dramatically changing this.

None of us see the world in which we live. What we actually see comes to us through a series of filters which we all use. These filters include our previous experience, what we know, and our emotional health at the time. Combined, these three factors form our perspective. Our perspective is just like our eyes – we mostly look through them rather than at them. And while we have access to things like mirrors and cameras to look at our eyes, our perspective has no immediate way to be viewed. 

Rather than view our perspective as either right or wrong, it is better to consider our perspective as either helpful or unhelpful. 

For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.
First Corinthians 13:12

.

PERCEPTION AND PERSPECTIVE

I know how it feels when “Everything is going wrong”. It’s in these times that we all see our circumstances as the the problem. To make things seem worse, the rise of filmic entertainment and social media, has given the perception that everyone else’s life is far better than our own. That is, no-one else has the problems that I have because their lives are all full of celebrations and holidays by the beach! Their kids are perfectly behaved! They are loved and have someone to love! They have loads of money and no debt issues! While they’re swimming by the beach, I’m drowning in a sea of problems! Thus, our perspective has a direct bearing on our perception of the circumstances we are in.

but man is born to trouble as the sparks fly upward.
Job 5:7

.

THE THREE KEYS SOLUTION

Give all your worries and cares to God, for He cares about you. 

First Peter 5:7 NLT

Our perspective is shaped by –

(i) our previous experience

(ii) what we know

(iii) our emotional health at the time.  

1. USE EXPERIENCE TO YOUR ADVANTAGE

Consider then how you might face all of your current problems if you had experienced similar problems before to these and actually come through them unscathed. If you did have this prior experience, how might it affect your current perspective? This insight is the first key to successfully dealing with our overwhelming problems: draw on your past experiences of successfully coming through problems – or if you can’t, then find someone who has and learn from them! This is why younger people are more at risk of feeling overwhelmed by their problems than those who have a little more life-experience. Imagine if you could go back in time when you were facing another difficult season in your life and talk to yourself. What would you say? Could your talk with yourself have changed your perspective at that time?

2. LEARN WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW

Maybe you have not experienced anything like the difficulties you are facing now. But what if you had been shown by someone how to solve these difficulties, would that change your perspective? What if you had read about someone else who had gone through something similar and responded in a way that worked to solve the problem. Would that change your perspective for whatever you are facing now?

A few years ago I was asked to take on the management of a struggling not-for-profit organisation. This organisation was insolvent (which meant it couldn’t pay its bills or debts). Several people had previously tried to turn it around but had been unable. There are lots and lots of things that I have no clue on how to solve, but I do know a few things about how the business of not-for-profit ministry organisations needs to work. Within a few months, after implementing what I already knew, things began to turn around. As I met challenges I had never met before, I set out to learn what I needed to know. Because of what I knew, and some past experiences in not-for-profit organisational turn-arounds, the solutions to the vexing problems which this organisation faced seemed obvious to me. Perhaps you now face problems with confidence and ease which once overwhelmed you? If you are currently facing problems which are overwhelming you, you need to apply this second key by finding someone or something that can help you learn how to deal with it.

3. EMOTIONAL WELL-BEING

When I am emotionally drained it seems that my problems are multiplied and magnified. Some of my biggest problems have actually been solved by a good night sleep! Our physical well-being has a bearing on our emotional well-being. Our emotions are formed by chemicals which are released into our blood system. These chemicals can be released involuntarily (such as in a time of shock), as a result of our diet (such as when you only eat a high carbohydrate and high sugar diet which increases the likelihood of depression), and, a lack aerobic exercise deprives the body of healthy endorphins which the brain and body needs to experience happiness. Therefore, if you want to reduce the number and intensity of your problems, get more sleep and less screen-time, cut right down on sugar and carbs, and do something that will get your heart pumping and you gasping for air!

¶ You hold my eyelids open; 
I am so troubled that I cannot speak.
Psalm 77:4

TELL ‘EM TO TAKE A NUMBER!

By drawing on your own or someone else’s experience to give you the confidence that you get through your difficulties, discovering strategies for better dealing with your problems (one of the best pieces of advice I was ever given was to “Tell your problems to take a number and get in line!” That is, deal with your biggest problems first and deal with them one at a time), and improving your diet and fitness, you’ll be amazed at what that can for your perspective of your problems. What you’ll find is that as your perspective shifts from the forest to the trees, you’ll discover that things aren’t nearly as bad as you had been thinking they were.

By using these three powerful keys you’ll find that even though your circumstances don’t change, your perception and perspective will. The Apostle Paul wrote to a church beginning to experience tremendous difficulties and hardship. Rather than telling them to pray that God might change their circumstances he encouraged them to look at their world differently: through the eyes of faith.

for we walk by faith, not by sight.
Second Corinthians 5:7

And it was the Apostle John whom God used to bequeath to the Church The Revelation. This closing book of the Bible is all about changing perspectives. While massive and brutal persecution was ruthlessly being waged against Christians around the time that The Revelation was written (65 AD), the Apostle gave his beleaguered audience a glimpse into the eternal realm where Christ was triumphant over all. Rather than getting all worked up about some of the nonsense which has been promoted as the interpretation of The Revelation, it is very safe to interpret this book as reminding believers to have a different perspective on life’s difficulties. Perhaps this is why so many first century believers rejoiced to lay down their lives for their risen Saviour and to be so bold in their witness.

¶ After this I looked, and behold, a door standing open in heaven! And the first voice, which I had heard speaking to me like a trumpet, said, “Come up here, and I will show you what must take place after this.”
Revelation 4:1

Amen.

Ps. Andrew Corbett