THINGS THAT CHRISTIANS CAN'T TALK ABOUT, Part 2 - DEPRESSION

 THINGS THAT CHRISTIANS CAN'T TALK ABOUT, Part 2 - DEPRESSION

All of us feel sad at some point – even people who are usually happy most of the time will have moments of sadness. Usually for most people there will be some understandable cause of it. This might include the loss of a loved one, a certain disappointment, an accident, or sympathy for friend or family member’s struggles. This kind of sadness is temporary. Yet there is a kind of sadness that lingers for weeks or months which leaves a person physically drained, perhaps teary, thinking dark thoughts, feeling desperately lonely and debilitated. This is usually when clinicians consider someone is experiencing ‘depression’ and it is one of those things that Christians find difficult to admit to or even talk about. Perhaps this is because Christians are supposed to be filled with the joy of the Lord, and able to cast all their anxieties onto the Lord, and therefore, presumably, be immune from such depression. But two facts make this untrue. Firstly, even many of the heroes in the Bible seem to have experienced some form of depression at least for a moment; and secondly, we each probably know of a godly follower of Christ who has done everything right yet still experiences recurring seasons of depression. I consider this topic to be one of the main things that Christians can’t talk about and probably should, and to this end I have some wisdom to offer in how we should go about it.

¶ Why are you cast down, O my soul,
and why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise Him,
my salvation  and my God.
My soul is cast down within me;
therefore I remember You
from the land of Jordan and of Hermon,
from Mount Mizar.
¶ Why are you cast down, O my soul,
and why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise Him,
my salvation and my God.
Psalm 42:5-6, 11

ABOUT DEPRESSION

Depression is not a ‘one size fits all’. It effects people differently. Some experience a lack of appetite while others experience an abnormal increase in appetite. Some experience continual suicidal thoughts, while many do not. Some are easily brought to tears, while others experience repeated bouts of anger. Some experience a heightened sense of anxiety while others are able to remain functional in their jobs and responsibilities.

Depression often universally results in prolonged negative, dark, unhealthy thoughts; and, social withdrawal. It frequently leaves a person feeling lonely (or alone), as if no-one cares, and a loss of motivation. However, depression can be treated so that its symptoms are dramatically lessened and even eradicated through either through: medication, counselling, prayer, a change of diet, and regular physical exercise, – or a combination of these. I list several therapeutic remedies other than pharmaceuticals because, while I have good reason to believe that there is some benefit that can be attained from prescribed anti-depressant medication (largely due to my own interactions with those who have greatly benefited from taking it, and also my interactions with the many doctors who have have reported to me the health benefits from their patients who have also taken such medication). But I suspect that many people now look exclusively to pharmaceuticals to solve their health problems. I must admit, over the past few years my cynicism about multi-national pharmaceutical companies’ motives for wanting people to think this way has only magnified. This is why I appreciate those medical doctors who take a holistic approach to helping their patients overcome their depression rather than just prescribing a life-long course of antidepressant pharmaceuticals.

 

BIBLICAL HEROES WITH DEPRESSION

One of the most startling examples of a man of God who had been used mightily by God, yet experienced a season of depression was the prophet Elijah. He lived in Northern Israel after the civil war which saw the ten tribes of Israel to the north of Jerusalem separate from the two southern tribes appoint their own king and establish their own Kingdom (to be known as ‘Ephraim’ or ‘Israel’) distinct from the Kingdom in the line of David and Solomon in the South (which became known as ‘Judah’). In First Kings 18 Elijah challenged the 450 prophets of Ba’al to a duel to see who was the true GOD. The context involved offering a slain bullock on an altar of wood and see which god or GOD would respond with fire to accept the burnt offering. The 450 prophets of Ba’al, despite their incantations, their enchantments, their spells (1Kings 18:26), and then finally the shedding of their own blood through cutting and lancing (1Kings 18:28), did not answer them or consume the sacrificial offering with fire. Elijah then offered them some unhelpful advice – 

And at noon Elijah mocked them, saying,
“Cry aloud, for he is a god.
Either he is musing, or he is relieving himself,
or he is on a journey,
or perhaps he is asleep and must be awakened.”
First Kings 18:27

 After these false prophets had finished and conceded that they (and their god, Ba’al) had failed, Elijah then asked for the sacrificed bullock and the altar of wood to be saturated in water twice over. Then Elijah cried out a short but profound prayer –

¶ And at the time of the offering of the oblation,
Elijah the prophet came near and said,
“O LORD, God of Abraham, Isaac, and Israel,
let it be known this day that you are God in Israel, and that I am your servant,
and that I have done all these things at your word.
Answer me, O LORD, answer me,
that this people may know that you, O LORD, are God,
and that you have turned their hearts back.”
First Kings 18:36-37

What happened next would have impressed Steven Spielberg (1Kings 18:38)!

I suspect that there would have been a large component of dehydration, malnutrition, and exhaustion, in what happened next to Elijah. He heard that the wicked queen Jezebel who worshiped Ba’al had ordered that Elijah be executed (1Kings 19:1-2). In fear for his life, Elijah fled to the Southern Kingdom to hide from Jezebel’s assassins (1 Kings 19:3). In the pit of despondency Elijah prayed that he might die (1Kings 19:4). And what we see next is that GOD began to address the cause of Elijah’s depression (not just his symptoms).

1. God gave Elijah sleep (1 Kings 19:5a).
2. God gave Elijah company (an angel, 1 Kings 19:5b).
3. God gave Elijah gave Elijah food and water (via the angel, 1 Kings 19:6).
4. God reestablished Elijah’s mission and gave him something constructive to do which involved him interacting with people are realising that his negative assessment of the situation was wrong (1 Kings 19:7, 15-18).  

Elijah is one example of many others recorded in the pages of Scripture who also experienced depression and who experienced almost exactly the same response from God (examples include Jeremiah, and Paul the Apostle).

 

BIBLICAL INSIGHTS FOR IMPROVING MENTAL HEALTH

I am not being naively simplistic about the remedy for depression. (Being simplistic with someone who is battling each of these topics that Christians can’t talk about is a large contributor to why some Christians are reluctant to talk about these issues!) But I see something in the opening chapters of Genesis that I find extremely helpful in managing moods and mental health. Sometimes you have to a little closer at something to realise what you’re actually looking at!

¶ And they heard the sound of the LORD God
walking in the garden in the cool of the day,
and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God
among the trees of the garden.
Genesis 3:8

Firstly, From this verse in the opening chapters of the Bible we see that God had created a paradisiacal environment for mankind to enjoy. (Mankind was not created to live apart from nature (gardens and wildlife). If all you ever see throughout your day is a screen, concrete and steel, your soul is being malnourished which then depletes our mental health!)

Secondly, mankind’s world was one in which they enjoyed a regular interaction with God. (Mankind was not created or designed to live without a vital communion with our Maker. Our prayerful interaction with God is nourishing for our soul.)

Thirdly, it appears that Man and GOD regularly walked together as they spoke with each other. There was a physical manifestation of God which enabled the first man and woman to “hear the sound of the LORD walking in the garden”. The simple act of walking and talking with God as you do is a spiritually replenishing activity. (Mankind was created to take a long daily stroll with God). Even several generations after Adam this was something that Enoch practised (Gen 5:22, 24) and benefited greatly from doing it.

Fourthly, Mankind were given an extensive fruit tree garden from which they could enjoy fresh, unprocessed whole foods. (Mankind was created and designed to eat a diet consisting largely unprocessed whole-foods. Our high-sugar, high complex-saturated fat, high processed diets have a negative impact not just on our physical health, but also on our mental and emotional health.)

Fifthly, Mankind was meant to live with a clear conscience by obedience to God and His Word. (Mankind was created monarchial, that is, royal. We were created in the Sovereign King of the Universe’s image to co-rule this world as His vice-regents. The serpent and its manipulating master, the Evil One, had nothing to offer our original parents except lies. Yet they willingly chose to reject the Truth and accept an outlandish lie. Today, the Evil One and his minions continue to dupe God’s Image bearers with malicious lies. Accepting these lies can only lead to poor mental health. This is why being grounded daily in the truth found in God’s Word is therapeutic for our souls and nourishing for our mental health.)

 

TALKING ABOUT IT

As with each of these topics, I want to encourage you to talk about these things — but I especially want to encourage you (and hopefully model) how to listen to those who do open up about their struggles. Sometimes the greatest gift we can give someone in those moments is a listening ear and the knowledge that someone cares enough to take the time to seek to understand what they are going through. And, as I have already stated here, and will repeat in Part 3, we should not offer judgment or simplistic answers. It’s my conviction that there are many lonely people in our church and especially outside of our church who long for someone who might offer them these two gifts of a listening ear, and understanding. I hope you can join me in being one of these gift givers.

Pastor at Large,

Andrew

Let me know what you think below in the comment section and feel free to share this someone who might benefit from this Pastor’s Desk.

READ PART 3, DIVORCE

ON YOUR SIDE

ON YOUR SIDE

How different would your life be if God was on your side in everything you did? Would you be permanently happy? Would you ever be sick? Would you be susceptible to dark thoughts? Would you be loved by all? What would a life with God on their side look like? We need not ponder this too long before we look at two clear examples in the Scriptures. Firstly, the young Jeremiah was called by God at one of the darkest times in his nation’s history and was given a dangerous and potentially deadly task. God revealed to him that he would be rejected and hated by his countrymen. But, despite this, and Jeremiah’s traumatic reaction to this divine mandate, God gave him a priceless promise of assurance:

Do not be afraid of them,
for I am with you to deliver you,
declares the LORD.”
Jeremiah 1:8

God’s charge and promise to Jeremiah would later help the young prophet to deal the enormous adversities he would later face (realistic expectations about life’s adversities is one of the best ways to maintain good mental health).  

If you had to go through what Jeremiah went through, would you want God’s presence with you or not?  

As we read through the Book of Jeremiah, we see that he experienced everything God said he would. But we also see that God sustained him and vindicated him. And as we read through the rest of Scripture we also realise that not everybody was called to do what Jeremiah was called to do, or to endure what Jeremiah had to endure. Perhaps at the end of Jeremiah’s long life he could say what F.W. Boreham would later say as he reflected back on his long life, “Often the things that we fear the most are the things that never happen!”

LIFE IS BETTER WITH GOD ON OUR SIDE EVEN WHEN LIFE IS DIFFICULT 

Sometimes when life gets tough, we blame God. Many people who go through adversity have a misplaced expectation that if God was with them then life would go smoothly. But how many of us look to God in dependent trust when everything in our lives is going well? When would you actually most appreciate hearing God promise you, “I will be with you!” — in good times or bad? Our first example of a life lived with God-on-our-side, Jeremiah, didn’t have this choice. God promised him that He would be with him. We might forgive Jeremiah if he thought that had meant that he would successful in everything he undertook for the Lord. After all, this is what David experienced when God promised to be with him –

And David had success in all his undertakings, for the LORD was with him.
First Samuel 18:14

But God’s presence doesn’t always mean our success (whatever ‘success’ means). In Jeremiah’s case, God’s presence was going to sustain him not just in the midst of his own personal trials (rejection, slander, and mistreatment), but also during a national series of crises including famine, pestilence, and military invasion! Despite his personal and national trials, God sustained Jeremiah with His presence. In fact, it appears that the Creator is so aware of how difficult it is for people to live in this fallen world that He offers His sustaining strength to those who would accept His offer of adoption. He does this, not because any of us deserve it, but because of His great and unconditional love for each one of us. 

For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!”…For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope
Romans 8:15, 20

HIS NAME SHALL BE IMMANUEL – ‘GOD WITH US’

Our second example of a God-on-our-side-life is Jesus Christ. When Jesus walked the shores of Galilee, it was the time of the Roman occupation of Israel. This meant it was a time of oppression and fear — and therefore, great anxiety. This puts most of what Christ taught in a completely different light because He was teaching that all people could draw near to God and experience His presence in the midst of tremendous adversity. It was Christ’s assurance of God’s presence that grounded His announcements of His Father’s watchful care for each person. Christ reinforced that His Father created each person to be a child of God, and that their life was His sacred gift to them and came with the promise that He would care for, and be with, them –

Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all.
Matthew 6:31-32

No matter what challenges you are facing, your heavenly Father knows what you need. No matter how dark life seems now, your heavenly Father can get you through it. No matter how lonely you are now, your heavenly Father knows what you’re feeling and loves you unconditionally. In fact, He longs for you. In His eyes, you are not an accident. You are an integral part of His plan and you need to know that He is on your side! 

Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.
Hebrews 4:16

Your pastor,

Pastor Andrew Corbett

HOW CHRIST MAKES THE BROKEN WHOLE

HOW CHRIST MAKES THE BROKEN WHOLE

For she said within herself, If I may but touch his garment, I shall be whole.
Matthew 9:21

Hurt people hurt people. We’ve all probably encountered a hurting person who hurt us. Perhaps we’ve even been the one doing the hurting. Being hurt hurts. Even the process to becoming healed of this hurt can hurt. And, because it is an unfamiliar hurt, even this longed for healing can create anxiety in some. This can result in the hurt person blame-shifting, withdrawing, and becoming highly critical. Because they then tend to repel others, this makes helping them really difficult. But it can be done. As Jesus demonstrated time and time again. 

And there was a woman who had had a discharge of blood for twelve years, and who had suffered much under many physicians, and had spent all that she had, and was no better but rather grew worse.
Mark 5:25-26

Some people have only ever known hurt and pain. From the youngest age they were the victim. They felt that all they ever deserved was rejection, betrayal, and mocking from those who should have most shown them acceptance, loyalty and affirmation. For these people, wholeness doesn’t exist and is not possible—until they witness it in someone else. Then they see what it can look like. This is what happen to the woman who had been haemorrhaging for twelve years. She had lost all hope. But then she began to hear the almost unbelievable stories of Jesus had done for others, and hope was rekindled. The first step toward wholeness for a broken person is a vision of what the pathway to wholeness looks like. For this broken woman it was getting close to Christ and then reaching out to Him. What she didn’t know was that Christ came near to her and invited her to be made whole.

She had heard the reports about Jesus and came up behind him in the crowd and touched his garment. For she said, “If I touch even His garments, I will be made well.” And immediately the flow of blood dried up, and she felt in her body that she was healed of her disease.
Mark 5:27-29

All hurt people travel with a map. From this map they derive the directions for navigating through their life. They come to certain ‘forks’ in the road they are travelling on which would look like constructive criticism or even a helpful challenge to most people, but their map indicates that  these ‘forks in the roads’ are attacks, or rejection, or pain. Their map suggests taking (what they wrongly consider to be) the easy road which can be traversed with offence, anger, and slander. And thus, their hurt grows and becomes a life template for how they respond to people who actually try and help them. The day that Jesus came near was the day this pattern changed for this broken lady. Instead of taking the easy road, she took what she had always considered to be the hard road and went into the crowd (her greatest fear) and encountered Christ there. But Christ made this hard road easy for her. She had always thought that in a crowd she was unseen and unknown. The day she encountered Jesus was the day she realised she was wrong. He had seen all along. He had seen the original abuse that had happened to her as a little girl which had caused the terrible injuries and had led to the humiliating and painful bleeding for twelve years of her life. He had seen the doctors trying but failing with their quackery to heal her brokenness and in the process taking everything she had.

And there was a woman who had had a discharge of blood for twelve years, and who had suffered much under many physicians, and had spent all that she had, and was no better but rather grew worse.
Mark 5:25-26

From the moment that Christ made this woman whole, much more than just her bleeding stopped. Wholeness may begin with a physical healing, but most often it doesn’t — because it starts in a person’s soul where their mind and heart are. This woman would have left from her encounter with Jesus with whole new road map of life. Those things that once caused her to be afraid, no longer did. Those things that she had always interpreted as threats, now looked like open doors. When Jesus asked the question that He already knew the answer to (as He often did), the spotlight was about to shift onto this formally broken woman — which had always invoked this woman’s greatest fears. But now Christ showed her that this moment was an open door for her to testify and to walk into her wholeness for the first time.

And Jesus, perceiving in Himself that power had gone out from Him, immediately turned about in the crowd and said, “Who touched My garments?”
Mark 5:30

WHAT WHOLENESS LOOKS LIKE

Whole people travel the same life journey but with a different map. They reach the same fork in the road but instead of their map marking these moments as attacks, rejection, pain, their map indicates growth, opportunity, and love. Their map suggests taking the low road (which always looks like the harder road). This road is traversed by humility, listening, and understanding. 

and said to them, “Whoever receives this child in my name receives Me, and whoever receives me receives Him who sent Me. For he who is least among you all is the one who is great.”
Luke 9:48

Many whole people were once hurt people. But they were blessed to have a glimpse of what wholeness looked like. When they saw it, it exposed their unforgiveness, malice, withdrawal and pride. It somehow revealed to them that each of those things were crippling them. This vision of wholeness encouraged them to use a different life-map. The next fork in the road was the hardest road-fork they had ever faced because they were so used to their fight or flight map that when they read their new map that Christ gave them, its directions included: listening, blessing, teachableness, and even generosity! As a hurt person they had previously become defensive, spiteful and self-justifying, but now their choice to be whole removed these responses from their new map.

¶ Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time He may exalt you,
First Peter 5:6

A whole person still feels pain – although they respond quite differently to a hurt person. A whole person still faces disappointment, disrespect, and disloyalty, yet they take the low road of blessing those who spitefully mistreat them. They hold their tongue – not because they really want to yell at the one standing in their way – but because they have chosen to listen first. Rather than become defensive, they become inquisitive. Although the criticism from another person stings, they treat it as a gift that might help them improve – rather than to let that sting fester into a serious hurt. At other times when someone expresses their displeasure with them they can reasonably assess whether this person’s opinion is what they use to define their identity or worth. In many cases, it will not be and in these instances they may find themselves quietly, but resolutely, disagreeing with their protagonist. And this introduces my final thought on achieving wholeness as a hurt person.

Whole people are neither dependent or independent people. Hurt people need other people. We all hurt from time to time and in those times we need the help of others. But some hurt people react by withdrawing from others and become independent. “I’ll never let anyone close to me again!” they silently vow to themselves. Of course, connecting two hurt people together often results in co-dependency. Hurt people in a co-dependent relationship feel that they both need the other person, and that the other person needs them. A whole person doesn’t allow someone else to become unreasonably dependent upon them. Even a parent knows that their infant child’s dependency upon them is reasonable for a season. A whole child will replicate their parent’s wholeness and grow to  become a reliable, dependable, interdependent adult. 

The Apostle Paul once lived as a hurt man. He then encountered Christ and became a whole man. He wrote to a people who were once hurt, the Colossians, and described to them the behaviour of hurt people.

But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth. Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. Colossians 3:8-10

He then goes on to describe how whole people live-

¶ Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.Colossians 3:12-14

And that’s one of the clearest visions a hurt person can have for what wholeness looks like. The only truly whole Person is the only Person who can truly help a hurt person to become a whole person. Sometimes, because a hurt person is so down and low, all they can do is to reach up to just touch the hem of His presence (Matt. 9:21) which why Christ still heals brokenness in the midst of those already following and adoring Him. Wholeness begins with the simple act of praying to Christ. This then leads to the beginning of their journey to wholeness—a journey that Christ does not leave you to walk alone. This Sunday as we gather to follow and adore Christ, let’s pray that more broken people will experience the wholeness that only Jesus can give.

Pastor Andrew