THINGS THAT CHRISTIANS CAN'T TALK ABOUT, Part 1 - Doubt

 THINGS THAT CHRISTIANS CAN'T TALK ABOUT, Part 1 - Doubt

There are several things that Christian’s can’t talk about — not because Christians are incapable of doing so, nor because they are forbidden from doing so, but because they can’t bring themselves to talk about it. Perhaps this is because when a person is redeemed from their old way of life, all his or her negative aspects are expected to be done away with as result. But this is not everyone’s experience. Sometimes, life gets messy, messed-up, and quite frankly – massively disappointing for some. Thus, believers who are supposed to ‘have it all figured out’, feel they can’t talk about: their doubts, their depression, their fear of death, and their marriages that are at risk of divorce. Their reluctance to do so could be because they might be thought of by other Christians as “weak”. But sadly, this reluctance to talk about their struggles with someone they trust only tends to compound their struggles. As a pastor it troubles me to see believers struggle like this. So, I would like to pastorally share some thoughts about this taboo topic of doubt in what will be part 1 in this short series of pastor’s desk articles of four taboo topics that Christians can’t talk about.

 

DEFINING FAITH

“I’ve been having lots of doubts lately.”
“You just need more faith!”

Unfortunately this kind of problem<>solution conversation happens way too often. It reveals two bigger problems. Firstly, it fails to appreciate that there are different kinds of doubt; and, secondly, it seems to misunderstand what faith is and the role it plays in dealing with doubt. Consider how this conversation might have gone – 

“I’ve been having lots of doubts lately.”
“How so?”
“I keep praying and God doesn’t seem to be answering my prayers.”
”Anything else?”
“Well yes. It’s got me wondering whether I’m really saved or not. After all, if I was really saved then God would answer all my prayers, wouldn’t He!”
“How do you know that God is not answering your prayers?”
“Because what I’ve been praying for hasn’t happened yet.”
“I see. Sometimes even those people in the Bible went through what you’ve been going through – with unanswered prayers and doubts about whether God really loved them – and I think that what you’ve been experiencing is pretty normal for most believers. Do you remember what happened to John the Baptist after he baptised Jesus when he saw the Holy Spirit descend upon Jesus and then heard the booming voice of the Father from heaven?”
“Yes. He was later locked up in jail and then sent messengers to Jesus asking if He was really the Messiah.”
“That’s right. His prayers had not been answered and he was perhaps wondering whether God loved him anymore.”

Not every admission of doubt should be treated with a dismissal such as “You need more faith!” Let’s look at the two problems this kind of dismissal reveals.

1. THERE ARE DIFFERENT KINDS OF DOUBT

¶ Now when John heard in prison about the deeds of the Christ, he sent word by his disciples and said to Him,
“Are You the One who is to come, or shall we look for another?”  And Jesus answered them,
“Go and tell John what you hear and see: the blind receive their sight and the lame walk,
lepers are cleansed and the deaf hear, and the dead are raised up, and the poor have good news preached to them.
And blessed is the one who is not offended by Me.”
¶ As they went away, Jesus began to speak to the crowds concerning John:
“What did you go out into the wilderness to see? A reed shaken by the wind?
What then did you go out to see? A man dressed in soft clothing?
Behold, those who wear soft clothing are in kings’ houses. What then did you go out to see? A prophet?
Yes, I tell you, and more than a prophet. This is he of whom it is written,
“‘Behold, I send my messenger before your face,
who will prepare your way before you.’
¶ Truly, I say to you, among those born of women there has arisen no one greater than John the Baptist.
Yet the one who is least in the kingdom of heaven is greater than he.
Matthew 11:2-11

John the Baptist’s doubt was circumstantial (his circumstances where negative). He was imprisoned and was probably despondent. But even at that low point, he remedied his doubt by asking for reasons to keep believing. Jesus did not condemn him for having doubts. In fact, he paid John the Baptiser the highest compliment (Matt. 11:11). Some doubts need a pastoral response that provides reassurance.

2. THERE ARE DIFFERENT KINDS OF FAITH

Some people regard faith as ‘believing things that cannot be proven’. There are, of course, some things that I believe for which I cannot prove are true. For example, I believe in the proposition that: my wife loves me. I feel that I have good reasons for believing this is true. But I can’t support my faith in this proposition with mathematics or a piece of objective evidence. All I have to rest my faith on the belief that my wife loves me is my thirty-seven-year friendship with Kim in which I have observed her self-sacrificing for my happiness and welfare; and, her daily testimony when she tells me, “I love you.” Faith can be based on what we have experienced when it aligns with supporting evidence.

I have faith about some things that I have never seen. I have never physically seen Jerusalem. But I have faith that it exists. Of course I have seen photographs and film footage of it, but there is a risk I am prepared to take in the work of photographers and journalists that they are being truthful. Added to this visual evidence, I also have the eye-witness testimonies of people in whom I trust who have actually been to Jerusalem. Faith can be grounded in the eye-witness testimonies of those who are trustworthy.

Therefore, genuine faith is grounded not just in personal experiences but in experiences that are supported by the observable and consistent evidence of reliable witnesses – including yourself. This means that faith is “trusting the evidence”. This is why Jesus rebuked Thomas the apostle for his refusal to believe the testimony of those he knew could be trusted-

¶ Now Thomas, one of the twelve, called the Twin, was not with them when Jesus came.
So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord.” But he said to them,
“Unless I see in his hands the mark of the nails, and place my finger into the mark of the nails,
and place my hand into his side, I will never believe.”
¶ Eight days later, his disciples were inside again, and Thomas was with them.
Although the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said,
“Peace be with you.” Then He said to Thomas, “Put your finger here, and see My hands;
and put out your hand, and place it in My side. Do not disbelieve, but believe.”
Thomas answered Him, “My Lord and my God!”  Jesus said to him,
“Have you believed because you have seen Me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.”
John 20:25-29

 

DEFINING ‘DOUBT’

John the Baptist’s doubt was a cry for reassurance. Thomas’s doubt was a rejection of those whom he had known were trustworthy. But there is also false doubt where someone ceases to have faith – not because there are no longer good reasons to believe or good reasons to disbelieve, but because a person no longer wants it to be true. Paul refers to two of his former colleagues who “rejected and shipwrecked” their faith because they became more attracted to the enticement of what may have been sexual sin-

holding faith and a good conscience. By rejecting this, some have made shipwreck of their faith,
among whom are Hymenaeus and Alexander, whom I have handed over to Satan that they may learn not to blaspheme.
First Timothy 1:19-20

Yet, there is a kind of genuine doubt that comes from a lack of awareness of appropriate evidence. This kind of doubt requires evidences and good reasons for believing (1Peter 3:15-16).

Then there is a kind of doubt that is actually a spiritual attack which Paul describes as “the flaming darts of the evil one” in Ephesians 6:16 where the enemy lures the child of God away from the source of their spiritual strength – 

In all circumstances take up the shield of faith,
with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one;
Ephesians 6:16

This kind of doubt requires being reminded of what God’s Word says. This is why the enemy seeks to keep the child of God from reading the Bible, hearing and experiencing the preaching of God’s Word with God’s people, and sharing with other believers in their small group.

Every believer is going to be subject to doubts. Some genuine doubts might sincerely question God, His Word, and His love. Some other doubts may be masking a battle with temptation to gratify sinful desires. But there is a healthy way to deal with both of these kinds of doubts.

 

DEALING WITH DOUBT

Doubt is normal. Questions that arise from having doubts nearly always have a reasonable answer. Hopefully by now you have heard me say that if you are battling with, or not battling with, your doubts, you should talk with a fellow believer in whom you trust. If you are run-down and battling with illness or injury in which you are physically vulnerable, then let you small group know about it so that they can pray for and with you. The other week I spoke with someone in this situation and they shared just how difficult it was to read their bible each day and to pray. As I spoke with them over the phone and did two things. I shared with them what I had read in my Bible that day and how it had effected me. Then I asked If I could pray for them and did so. Sometimes when we are run-down we need the strength of another believer to have the grace to continue to stand (1 Peter 4:10). This is why our small groups, and interactions with our brothers and sisters in Christ each Sunday after our worship service is so invaluable.

Sharing your troubling doubts with another believer in whom you trust is not something you should feel you can’t talk about. And if you are someone who does have someone share the battle they are having doubts, then remember the exchange between John the Baptist’s messengers and Jesus, and how Christ had responded to them, and be gentle.  

¶ As for the one who is weak in faith, welcome him, but not to quarrel over opinions.
Romans 14:1

As I approach the sixth decade of following Christ and growing in my understanding of God’s Word, I am now more convinced than ever before that for every intellectual objection to GOD and His Word there is a reasonable answer supporting our belief in the God of the Bible and Bible itself. If you have any doubts about this, let’s have a talk.

Pastor at Large,

Andrew

Let me know what you think below in the comment section and feel free to share this someone who might benefit from this Pastor’s Desk.

READ PART 2, DEALING WITH DEPRESSION

THE RESILIENT

THE RESILIENT

For this very reason, make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue,
and virtue with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with steadfastness, and steadfastness with godliness, and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love. For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they keep you from being ineffective or unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Second Peter 1:5-8

Resilience was one of the predominant character traits of the early Christians. They called it being steadfast. For these early Christians being ‘resilient’ meant being able to keep going despite set backs, discouragements, betrayals, unforeseen circumstances, lack of energy, motivation, and resources. Like a weary hiker looking down a long road that leads to the mountain range they must walk over, being resilient in life means putting one foot in front of the other, and then doing it again, and again, and again, and so on. God knows that today, in what many are describing as “Post-Christendom” (and the resilient among us prefer to think of as Pre-Christendom) to be resilient is to live with a purpose, to stay focused, to live for others, and to strive toward a good, honourable, goal. With so many reasons to lose sight of the true purpose of life the tendency is to be tricked into believing that life right now is too hard. But the truth be told – people need to know how to be more resilient. Leaders especially need to be resilient right now. Churches assuredly need to be resilient at this time. With the recent interference into churches by government through the measures they said was “to keep people safe” — it has actually depleted people’s ability and willingness to be resilient! Here’s what leaders, people, and churches can do about it.

The Apostle Barnabas always urged his converts to Christ to be resilient against the opposition, hardships, persecutions, and false teachings they would have to endure, telling them to be steadfast. 

When he came and saw the grace of God,
he was glad, and he exhorted them all to remain faithful
to the Lord with steadfast purpose
Acts 11:23

Barnabas’s exhortation gives us the vital keys to becoming resilient: (i) remain faithful to the Lord by continuing to meet together as a church fellowship, and (ii) live with steadfast purpose. The Apostle Paul learned from his mentor and he too also made it his practice to urge believers to be resilient – 

¶ Therefore, my beloved brothers, be steadfast, immovable,
always abounding in the work of the Lord,
knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain.
First Corinthians 15:58

In this verse Paul gives us additional keys to developing the kind of resilience necessary to be a mature Christian: (i) Be immovable in your commitment to doing the right thing by Christ and your brothers and sisters; (ii) always abound in the work of the Lord by serving others; and (iii) know and remember that everything you do in and on behalf of your church family is actually for the Lord and is therefore “not in vain”.

Older men are to be sober-minded, dignified,
self-controlled, sound in faith, in love, and in steadfastness.
Titus 2:2

Perhaps it’s because ‘older men’ (you know, men 60-years of age and older) all tend to be grumpy (I personally wouldn’t know about this because I am only in my fifties) that Paul tells his lieutenant, Titus, to encourage the older men in the church of Crete to be: (i) sober-minded (more positive in their outlook), (ii) dignified (be a good role model of what a happy man of God looks like), (iii) self-controlled (especially with how the talk and use their time), (iv) sound in faith (lovers of God and His Word), (v) loving (cheering on the next generation of Christian leaders despite their youth and inexperience), and (vi) steadfast (in their endurance and dogged commitment to participate in the service and communal worship of the Church).

Without resilience it is simply not possible to know, love, and enjoy God to the fullest. The younger half-brother of Jesus, the Apostle James, wrote this – 

And let steadfastness have its full effect,
that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing...
¶ Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial,
for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life,
which God has promised to those who love him.
James 1:4, 12

James actually said that the believer’s steadfast resilience would result in the believer receiving a glorious reward from the Lord – the crown of life. 

In the past few years pastors have faced more challenges than most. Yes there were many unprecedented challenges, but pastors had deal with all kinds of hindrances from doing their job in a way that was obedient to Christ and His Holy Word. In Glenn Packiam’s book, ‘The Resilient Pastor’, he tells pastors that –

What have we observed so far? There has been a shifting of cultural tectonic plates as many contexts have become more and more post-Christian. The clearest way to explain that in terms of the earthquake-like shift is to say that we are post- Christendom, that era when Christianity and country, the kingdom of God and a sociopolitical kingdom, were symbiotically connected. This shift—though not necessarily the total rupture of the relationship—has caused a surge in the cultural oceanic waters. These waves look like the rise of new kinds of pluralism, paganism, and individualism.The aftermath is a mess. There are casualties—think of the programs churches would run that no longer exist, the TV shows in which Christianity was assumed as the backdrop for the family conflict, the changing laws about marriage, and more. And there is confusion. Christian impulses and values are being used to condemn Christian doctrines, practices, and institutions. The West is trying to sever the tree from its root while still demanding its fruit. –Glenn Peckiam, The Resilient Pastor, Barna Group, 2022, Page 40

Even though the pandemic has been over for two years now, its detrimental effects on how many believers viewed church is still taking a toll. In some respects, the pandemic brought unseen things to the surface and exposed what had long laid hidden. Sadly, one of those things was — What constitutes ‘church’ and what does being a part of church family Biblically mean? Many pastors now realise that many within their church congregation had a very poor understanding of how the Bible describes what the church is and what it means to be the church.

Earlier this year when it seemed that I was close to death’s door, I was physically unable to be with my church family on each Lord’s Day for nine weeks. Never in my life – and particularly never in my 27-years of pastoring Legana had I been absent from church for that long. My heart ached. When the specialist told me that my condition was terminal and that there could be no treatment or improvement in my condition, I knew that my absence must end. I needed to be physically present with my church family. There is something very physical and tangible about being the church. Christ has ensured that when His church comes together it will involve all of our physical and spiritual senses. When we partake of the holy and sacred elements of communion, we are holding the Lord’s body together as we ingest the consecrated unleavened bread. When we hold the cup we smell the fruit of the vine and imbibe His blood. When we hear each other pray and sing our praises and touch one another’s souls by our participation in exalting Christ together. As we hear the Word of God read, we hear, Our Father in heaven…forgive us as we forgive others. We are reminded of our role as a church to be the body of Christ as a visible presentation of God’s love and forgiveness to a bitter, unforgiving, unforgiven, angry, hurt, world.

Thus, it is a prime responsibility of a local church to meet together each Lord’s Day as our highest priority. We must draw from the encouragement of the first apostles as recorded in God’s Word who taught the first Christians how to be resilient. We must then re-learn these same keys:

(i) Look to Christ as the Lord in constant prayer;

(ii) Overlook offences that keep us from being immovable in our devotion to Christ and His holy Church;

(iii) Take your stand on God’s Word daily to draw spiritual strength and encouragement so that we can receive revelation from Him, because, above all – He (not the world) is our Audience of One.

May God grant us His grace to be resilient, abounding in good works, fruitful in our service of others, and ever hopeful that we have been promised a brighter and better future than our past.

Amen.

Pastor at Large,

Andrew

Let me know what you think below in the comment section and feel free to share this someone who might benefit from this Pastor’s Desk.

"COME ON IN AND JOIN US"

“COME ON IN AND JOIN US”

 

Some people think of ‘church’ as a place of religious rituals. To them it a place where sermons are preached, hymns are sung, weddings are conducted, funerals formalised, and babies are dedicated or ‘christened’. But I want to help people to reimagine what ‘church’ actually is intended to be in our day. To do this I want to introduce the biblical concept of the table. We all use tables. We use a table to display a vase of flowers. We use a table to put cups of coffee or tea on. We use a table to do our homework. We use a table to put beautifully large photo books on. And we use a table for our family members and guests to come together around and enjoy a meal. But then, there is the way that the Bible speaks of the table and if more people could realise the significance what this means, it would dramatically effect how they think about church. To begin to understand this we need to start in the Old Testament and begin to realise that “the table” was the means a person received status. Thus, we begin our survey of the Bible by looking at the incredibly unlikely promotion of Mephibosheth in one of the most beautiful stories in the Bible.

The new king, David, had previously formed a covenant with the son of the previous king, Jonathan, that if anything untoward should happen to him that David would take care of his family (1Sam 20:12-15). After Jonathan had been killed in battle, David sought to honour his vow to Jonathan. An enquiry was made as to whether there was indeed any family members of Jonathan’s family whom David should care for. The answer came that there was indeed someone: Mephibosheth. King David then summoned the former royal servant, Ziba, who bore responsibility to care for the orphaned son of Jonathan (and grandson of the late king Saul).

¶ Then the king called Ziba, Saul’s servant, and said to him,
“All that belonged to Saul and to all his house I have given to your master’s grandson.
And you and your sons and your servants shall till the land for him and shall bring in the produce,
that your master’s grandson may have bread to eat.
But Mephibosheth your master’s grandson shall always eat at my table.”
Now Ziba had fifteen sons and twenty servants. Then Ziba said to the king,
“According to all that my lord the king commands his servant, so will your servant do.”
So Mephibosheth ate at David’s table, like one of the king’s sons.
And Mephibosheth had a young son, whose name was Mica.
And all who lived in Ziba’s house became Mephibosheth’s servants.
So Mephibosheth lived in Jerusalem, for he ate always at the king’s table.
Now he was lame in both his feet.
Second Samuel 9:9-13

Mephibosheth was a cripple who could offer nothing to king David – yet David granted him the right to “always eat at the king’s table”. This right gave Mephibosheth royal privileges and royal status. This story of Mephibosheth is a picture of what God has done for each of us. We were all ‘spiritually crippled’ when God in His grace reached out to each of us and saved us, adopted us, and made us joint-heirs with our heavenly brother, the Lord Jesus Christ (Rom. 8:17). We now, like Mephibosheth, have been granted access to The King’s Table. The apostle Paul, in writing to the Corinthians, described this as the table of the Lord and told the Corinthian believers that this demanded their whole-hearted allegiance (this is why he told them that it was not possible to partake of the table of the Lord and the table of demons) –

You cannot drink the cup of the Lord and the cup of demons.
You cannot partake of the table of the Lord and the table of demons.
First Corinthians 10:21

Many believers refer to the table of Lord as if it means holy Communion in the same way that the Lord’s Supper does (1Cor. 11:20). But we must come to see that when God invited us to ‘the table of the Lord’ it was a statement of His acceptance of us and His adoption of us as His royal sons and daughters! Just like Mephibosheth who was taken out of his desperate plight and given access to the King’s Table which totally changed his status, the LORD has taken us out of our desperate plight and granted us unimpeded access to the King of Kings’ Table! This is quite unlike the royal banquets of our modern era in which kings and queens would hold invite honoured guests to occasional dinners. But what king David did for Mephibosheth – and what GOD has done for us – is not merely occasional, it is a permanent invitation to join the king every day for dinner! Turning up at the king’s table for this daily meal was a statement on behalf of the invited guest of their acceptance of the king’s offer of adoption. To not turn up each day required an explanation to be given to the king lest it appeared to be seen as a rejection of the king’s offer (1Sam 20:24-29). Thus, when we assemble each Sunday we are coming to the Lord’s Table as His children to partake of the meal that He has provided for us – including the Lord’s Supper  and the serving of the ‘Bread of Life’ (John 6:35, 48) as the Word of God is sung, preached and taught (Rom. 16:25; 1Cor. 15:1).  

Our gathering as a church is like a gathering together for ‘a meal’. But it is as if we are hosting a meal in which everyone is invited. Perhaps it is not everyone’s usual experience to have a total stranger turn up unannounced at their home at dinner time who then expects to be seated at your dinner table and fed! But, this should be the usual experience of every healthy local church – including ours. We should not just expect that first-time visitors will turn up at our church, but we should also expect that such people will be welcomed to our ‘dining table’ church service and made to feel welcomed. Therefore, those who are welcoming people as they come through the front doors of our church are helping to set an enormously important welcome-culture! Then, our auditorium-greeters are also reinforcing this welcoming culture as people move into our auditorium.

Each Saturday we use social media to invite people from all kinds of backgrounds to join us at our Sunday ‘dining table’ church service. This is because we want everyone to feel welcome at our church as we meet together each Sunday together and in various homes throughout the week. 

It is when a family and their guests gather for a dinner and are seated around the dinner table that they talk, share their stories, reflect on their highlights and lowlights, pray, pray for each other, and discuss important and not so important things. Thus, the dining table is a gathering point where there is laughter, enjoyment, sympathy, music, food and celebration. 

God settles the solitary in a home;
He leads out the prisoners with singing,
but the rebellious dwell in a parched land.
Psalm 68:6

There is a significant difference between a house and a home. A house is just a building. A home is where a person or people belong. As more and more people experience disconnection and loneliness, it is my hope that together we can be a family that some people don’t ordinarily enjoy. And it is my hope that we can be a home for many people who even though they have a place to live – they don’t have a home. The Psalmist declared that God settles the lonely in a home (Psa. 68:6).

In Him you also are being built together into a dwelling place for God by the Spirit.
Ephesians 2:22

Make yourself at home and… What comes after this invitation is a request to help with the dinner. This might include setting the table, putting condiments on the table, taking the meals to the table, clearing the table, washing the dishes, and offering drinks. Make yourself at home and join in by helping. The more people join in and help, that more people we can welcome to take a seat our ‘dining table’. 

The New Testament Church is often depicted as the place where ‘the table of the Lord’ is located. Thus, the Bible describes the Church as made up of those people who have been legally admitted to the Table of the Lord where they come together to serve one another, enjoy a soul-nourishing meal, and be ready to make room for one more person to join them at the dinner table. This is why we invite everyone to come in and join us. 

Pastor at Large,

Andrew

Let me know what you think below in the comment section and feel free to share this someone who might benefit from this Pastor’s Desk.