Thursday, 27 August 2009
FAMILIES CAN BE TRICKY
Fathers' day is soon upon us. it will be a time when families gather. But family gatherings can be tense!
Family members tend to say things to each other that they would never dare say to an acquaintance (even if they think it). This can create problems. But so does not saying something that needs to be said a family member. Other problems that families might face include -
The family unit is the place where we can be ourselves. Someone has once said-
Perhaps no-one else knows us better than our own family. This kind of knowledge comes from living with each other. When you share a bathroom with someone you learn a lot about them! But the bathroom is not the usual place where family bonds are strengthened most. If done correctly, that's the place Dining Table is the place of deep bonding.
In his book, BRANDING FAITH, Dr. Phil Cooke makes an interesting if not ironic observation. He observes that churches are built today to look 'non-religious'. In fact, he seems to suggest that church buildings being built today lack imagination and are actually rather bland - especially compared to the type of church buildings that were built with an artistic interpretation in generations gone by. But then he asks, but where are we more likely to see a modern cathederal ceiling today? In a family home! Cooke makes the point that churches are being built today with little thought about their message, whereas, churches of the past were often built to be an integral part of the message of a church. They were built as sacred places. Cooke seems to be saying that people are created to enter into a sacred place. He wonders whether the change in church architecture has had any affect on family-home architecture. He says that homes are now being built with an altar (TV/computer), choir stall (sound system), cathederal ceiling, stained-glass windows, a nave (where the people congregate), and a pulpit. The family-home is now being deiberately designed as a sacred space.
While Cooke is only discussing architecture and its message in that portion of his book, it got me wondering about not just the home being a sacred place, but the family itself being a sacred gathering. It is the ultimate home-group!
The family gathering is the place where the father acts as the pastor (elder) and the mother acts as the deacon (minister) and the children serve and contribute with their gifts and abilities. It is the place where Christ is ministered to each other through each other. It is the place of confession - where we learn to seek and give forgiveness. It is the place where the Word is read and pondered. It is where bread is continually broken together. It is the place of prayer. It is one of the best expressions of pastoral care.
This idea should cause fathers especially to feel inadequate. As the pastor of their family, a father has a responsibility to guide, shepherd (feed, nurture, and protect), minister the Word of God to, pray for, love, and develop his wife and children. Every father should recognise their inadequacy and therefore their need for God's help to do his job. Children, pray for your Dad - he needs it!
As tricky as being in a family can be, they're still worth it. As followers of Christ we are all called into a local church to be a church family. We should, of all people, therefore, know how to function as a healthy family. Paul stresses the importance of being a member of a healthy and functioning family by setting it as the standard for any church leader to have already demonstrated their spiritual leadership within their own family.
While we as a church provide pastoral care through our Bible study and small groups (where we are cared for, prayed for, and ministered to) and in crisis intervention and counselling through our elders, we must strive to ensure that each family in our church is a sacred gathering where pastoral care is maximised.
Today I heard that there has been a dramatic rise in clinical depression rates among Australians. I think I heard on the same news-cast that around 1 in 5 Australian adults have sought help for depression from their GP. I just wondered whether there was a corelation between the breakdown of the family unit and the rise in depression rates?
As the head of a house, a father has the priestly duty to shepherd his wife and children in and by prayer. He gathers his family to the dinner table and leads them in a prayer of thanks for the meal and other things. He encourages his family to share their souls ("How was your day?" "What happened in your day today?" "What have you been thinking lately?" "If you were stranded on a deserted island, what are three small things you would want to be stranded with?" "What have you read in your Bible today?"). A father kneels with his children beside their bed as he prays with them and shares Scripture with them. A father runs his hands through the souls of his children and wife and offers a sympathetic listening ear and a caring word with them.
As we approach Fathers' Day, I wonder how different families would be today if dads took their spiritual responsibilities more seriously?
If you are blessed with a loving family- especially if you are blessed with a loving mother and father and brothers and sisters, then thank God! If you need to be reconciled to your family, do it! It's worth the effort. If you are a young mum or dad, lay a strong spiritual foundation in your new family. Perhaps all this can be best summed up by the words of Paul to the Colossians-
Yes, families can be tricky. But they are worth the effort because they are the place where we can be ourselves; know that we are cared for; and where we know we are encouraged to grow in the grace of God. Yes, families can be tricky, but God has enabled dads in particular to be able to make it happen well.
Colossians 3:18-21¶ Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.
Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.
Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.
Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.
Family members tend to say things to each other that they would never dare say to an acquaintance (even if they think it). This can create problems. But so does not saying something that needs to be said a family member. Other problems that families might face include -
- Parents who neglect their children (if you are parent, do you know the names of your child school teachers? Parents, do you hug your child?)
- Children who disrespect the parents (if you are a child, do you answer your parents back? Do you ignore your parents' requests and boundaries?)
- Husbands and wives (Husbands, do you tell your wife regularly that you love her and in addition say it with words? Wives, do you give yourself freely to your husband? Husbands, do you make time to talk and spend time with your wife? Wives, do you hold bitterness toward your husband?)
The family unit is the place where we can be ourselves. Someone has once said-
To like someone we must know their strengths,
but to love someone we must know their weaknesses.
Perhaps no-one else knows us better than our own family. This kind of knowledge comes from living with each other. When you share a bathroom with someone you learn a lot about them! But the bathroom is not the usual place where family bonds are strengthened most. If done correctly, that's the place Dining Table is the place of deep bonding.
In his book, BRANDING FAITH, Dr. Phil Cooke makes an interesting if not ironic observation. He observes that churches are built today to look 'non-religious'. In fact, he seems to suggest that church buildings being built today lack imagination and are actually rather bland - especially compared to the type of church buildings that were built with an artistic interpretation in generations gone by. But then he asks, but where are we more likely to see a modern cathederal ceiling today? In a family home! Cooke makes the point that churches are being built today with little thought about their message, whereas, churches of the past were often built to be an integral part of the message of a church. They were built as sacred places. Cooke seems to be saying that people are created to enter into a sacred place. He wonders whether the change in church architecture has had any affect on family-home architecture. He says that homes are now being built with an altar (TV/computer), choir stall (sound system), cathederal ceiling, stained-glass windows, a nave (where the people congregate), and a pulpit. The family-home is now being deiberately designed as a sacred space.
While Cooke is only discussing architecture and its message in that portion of his book, it got me wondering about not just the home being a sacred place, but the family itself being a sacred gathering. It is the ultimate home-group!
The family gathering is the place where the father acts as the pastor (elder) and the mother acts as the deacon (minister) and the children serve and contribute with their gifts and abilities. It is the place where Christ is ministered to each other through each other. It is the place of confession - where we learn to seek and give forgiveness. It is the place where the Word is read and pondered. It is where bread is continually broken together. It is the place of prayer. It is one of the best expressions of pastoral care.This idea should cause fathers especially to feel inadequate. As the pastor of their family, a father has a responsibility to guide, shepherd (feed, nurture, and protect), minister the Word of God to, pray for, love, and develop his wife and children. Every father should recognise their inadequacy and therefore their need for God's help to do his job. Children, pray for your Dad - he needs it!
As tricky as being in a family can be, they're still worth it. As followers of Christ we are all called into a local church to be a church family. We should, of all people, therefore, know how to function as a healthy family. Paul stresses the importance of being a member of a healthy and functioning family by setting it as the standard for any church leader to have already demonstrated their spiritual leadership within their own family.
First Timothy 3:1-5, ¶ If anyone wants to provide leadership in the church, good! But there are preconditions: A leader must be well-thought-of, committed to his wife, cool and collected, accessible, and hospitable. He must know what he’s talking about not be overfond of wine, not pushy but gentle, not thin-skinned, not money-hungry. He must handle his own affairs [home] well, attentive to his own children and having their respect. For if someone is unable to handle his own affairs, how can he take care of God’s church? [THE MESSAGE]
While we as a church provide pastoral care through our Bible study and small groups (where we are cared for, prayed for, and ministered to) and in crisis intervention and counselling through our elders, we must strive to ensure that each family in our church is a sacred gathering where pastoral care is maximised.
Today I heard that there has been a dramatic rise in clinical depression rates among Australians. I think I heard on the same news-cast that around 1 in 5 Australian adults have sought help for depression from their GP. I just wondered whether there was a corelation between the breakdown of the family unit and the rise in depression rates?
As the head of a house, a father has the priestly duty to shepherd his wife and children in and by prayer. He gathers his family to the dinner table and leads them in a prayer of thanks for the meal and other things. He encourages his family to share their souls ("How was your day?" "What happened in your day today?" "What have you been thinking lately?" "If you were stranded on a deserted island, what are three small things you would want to be stranded with?" "What have you read in your Bible today?"). A father kneels with his children beside their bed as he prays with them and shares Scripture with them. A father runs his hands through the souls of his children and wife and offers a sympathetic listening ear and a caring word with them.
As we approach Fathers' Day, I wonder how different families would be today if dads took their spiritual responsibilities more seriously?
If you are blessed with a loving family- especially if you are blessed with a loving mother and father and brothers and sisters, then thank God! If you need to be reconciled to your family, do it! It's worth the effort. If you are a young mum or dad, lay a strong spiritual foundation in your new family. Perhaps all this can be best summed up by the words of Paul to the Colossians-
Colossians 3:18-21¶ Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.
Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.
Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.
Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.
Yes, families can be tricky. But they are worth the effort because they are the place where we can be ourselves; know that we are cared for; and where we know we are encouraged to grow in the grace of God. Yes, families can be tricky, but God has enabled dads in particular to be able to make it happen well.
Wednesday, 26 August 2009
Friday, 21 August 2009
SUCKLED WITH ROCK HONEY
Deuteronomy 32:13 He made him ride on the high places of the land,
and he ate the produce of the field,
and he suckled him with honey out of the rock,
and oil out of the flinty rock.
I'm reading F.W. Boreham's, "The Uttermost Star", which he wrote shortly after he had been pastoring the Hobart Baptist church. He opens this classic book with an essay about Majorie. She was an elderly lady that FWB was asked to visit. Prior to meeting her he wondered how he would make conversation with her. But when he met her and introduced himself he soon found that the conversation flowed so naturally that he felt that he had nothing to do with it. Marjorie was now blind in her old age. Yet FWB found her witty, bright, and engaging. As she spoke, Boreham was struck by her breadth of vocabulary. (People who read widely invariably develop such a broad vocabulary.) He asked her about her conversion. Her answer soon enchanted him.She described her conversion as finding "the sweetness of religion". Boreham had never heard anyone describe their conversion in this way. As he invited her to share about her life's journey with Christ Marjorie implied that the rest of her walk with Christ could not be described as "sweet". Boreham picked up on this. "Well" she explained, "life got hard." Marjorie described life after she got married and together she and her husband had children. There wasn't time for the sweetness of religion then, she offered. Especially, she went on, when in one week they buried one son on Tuesday and the other on Thursday and then her husband died shortly after! Life could indeed be hard. Boreham interjected, Did you lose the sweetness of religion during these times Marjorie? She replied that it was during this time that she experienced not the sweetness of religion, but the power of religion that sustained her through such heart-ache. Did you ever lose faith Marjorie? She put her face momentarily in her hands as the pain of the answer uneasily came forward.
Yes there was a time, she said. I despaired. I went to my usual place of prayer beside my bed and once again put my knees into the well-worn spots on the carpet, but I couldn't pray. I looked to heaven but there was too much disappointment in my heart toward God. It was then that I felt His hand. Literally. I felt an invisible hand on my shoulder and heard the comforting words of the Saviour telling me that He would never abandon me. This is the power of religion that Marjorie referred to earlier. From this point, Marjorie continued, I remained steadfast to the Lord in the security of His unfailing presence in my life.
FWB thanked Marjorie for her time and also for her inspiration. Inspiration? Yes, said Boreham, you've given me my sermon for Sunday! I shall preach on the Lord the Rock. I shall base this on Deuteronomy 32 where the Rock is described as guiding Israel to its Promised Land and then suckling them with honey. This is the sweetness that Marjorie had referred to. But it is also the power that Marjorie referred to- a Rock of immovable steadfastness and protective security.
Deuteronomy 32:13 He made him ride on the high places of the land,
and he ate the produce of the field,
and he suckled him with honey out of the rock,
and oil out of the flinty rock.
As I read this opening chapter in THE UTTERMOST STAR, I also pondered Marjorie's story and FWB's reflection upon it. Boreham explained to Marjorie that he had just read an article about Palestinian bees and how they often hive their honey in rocks- especially the rocks of cliffs. To retrieve their prized honey, the hunter would sometimes have to scale a cliff-face where he could literally suck the honey out of the rocks. Boreham's analogy made me think about the statement that if you want leaves you use a rake and just scratch the surface; but if you want gold you use a shovel and dig a little deeper. I also considered the most common description of the Promised Land as a land that flowed with "milk and honey". But it appears that although God had provided the honey, he sometimes expected people to climb cliffs to retrieve it! Yes Marjorie, life can be hard! I considered how lazy I sometimes am when it comes to enjoying the sweet things of Jesus. Sometimes the Word of God is like a cliff that requires time and effort to scale for its sweet treasures. But there are also other seasons of life, as Marjorie found, when you need a Rock underneath your feet, and cleft in that Rock to keep you safe. It's sometimes during those times when we are most worn down, and even worn out, that Jesus becomes our Rock from whom we can suckle honey and have oil proceed to soothe our injured souls.
Deuteronomy 32:13 He made him ride on the high places of the land,
and he ate the produce of the field,
and he suckled him with honey out of the rock,
and oil out of the flinty rock.
It is my pastoral prayer that we may enjoy the sweetness of the Lord Jesus, the security of the Lord Jesus' presence, and the oil of His Holy Spirit to soothe and heal our wounded hearts. If you have Jesus in your soul, you have Treasure incomparable, worth more than honey suckled from a rock.
Ps. Andrew
Tuesday, 18 August 2009
Thursday, 13 August 2009
Why We Care
Luke 10:33-34 ¶ But a Samaritan, as he journeyed, came to where he was, and when he saw him, he had compassion. He went to him and bound up his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he set him on his own animal and brought him to an inn and took care of him.
What must I do to be saved? This is the question that Jesus was asked several times. In one instance, He was asked this by a lawyer. Jesus put the question back onto the lawyer who responded by saying that salvation was a matter of loving God and your neighbour. Jesus affirmed this answer. "Do this and you shall live." But then the lawyer seeking to justify himself asked the Christ who his neighbour was. This was the occasion that led Christ to tell the story of the Good Samaritan. The amazing thing about this response is that Jesus focussed more on the evidence, or, fruit, of those who were saved. In the instance of the Good Samaritan, the fruit of the Good Samaritan was his care for others. But this was the kind of care that was completely unreasonable! The Good Samaritan cared for others outside of his world.
As a church, I hope that we are known for two things. Firstly, that we love God with all our minds and exercise our intellectual faculties to do so. Secondly, that we care, and that we care for those outside of our world- people that could never pay us back, or join our church, or tell our friends what we have done for them. This is why we care about those in our Valley, even if they never come to our church. This is why we care about legislation that our State Government proposes, even though it may never affect us directly. This is why we send out people on short-term missions trips to help in foreign countries, this is why we send out preaching and ministry teams to other churches (around 16 churches so far this year).Romans 12:2 Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.
I hope that we can love and care for people just like the Good Samaritan did.
Wednesday, 12 August 2009
From Anguish To Peace
Josie was dying. She was deeply distraught and in intolerable anguish. Her family didn't know what to do. Despite the best efforts of the Hospital's medical staff, nothing more could be done for Josie. Her pain was more than just the pain of what happens when cancer invades and conquers a body. Her shrieks, moaning and writhing was making her family feel even more helpless. Finally, her husband called for her pastor. Then things took a dramatic turn.
Pastor Gordon MacDonald arrived at the hospital twenty minutes later. He saw the family and medical team around Josie's bed. He said to himself, "Be a Pastor."
When Gordon MacDonald spoke to Josie, he recognised that her pain and anguish was not due to problems with the medication or care she had been given. It was spiritual. Spiritual anguish affects your mind. It then manifests in your body. People who carry guilt can experience a tightening in the neck and shoulders and a heaviness in their chest. They see a doctor but find no relief. Then one day a pastor guides them through confession, forgiveness, and reconciliation and their neck, shoulders and chest immediately feel different. Josie's anguish was spiritual. She felt guilty that she was dying and would no longer be able to love, care for, and look after her husband and daughters. Pastor Mac empathised with her. He then reassured her. He then put his hands on her tense and agitated shoulders and gently but firmly pushed her writhing shoulders back onto the bed. He then asked Josie to look at him. With her eyes attentive to him, he recited Psalm 23 to her. And then he said-
Josie went from anguish to peace by having her true condition attended to. She experienced in the last what I suspect we all crave, to die with the greatest dignity that comes from having a soul at peace with God and thereby at peace with others. Because of this her family at her bedside experienced a moment they would treasure for the rest of their lives.
Do you have a Pastor? Do you have peace for your soul?
Pastor Gordon MacDonald arrived at the hospital twenty minutes later. He saw the family and medical team around Josie's bed. He said to himself, "Be a Pastor."
"Josie!" I said as I approached. I said her name firmly, as if to establish my presence with some authority.
"Pastor Mac!" she responded. The circle broke as everyone stepped back to make room for me.
When Gordon MacDonald spoke to Josie, he recognised that her pain and anguish was not due to problems with the medication or care she had been given. It was spiritual. Spiritual anguish affects your mind. It then manifests in your body. People who carry guilt can experience a tightening in the neck and shoulders and a heaviness in their chest. They see a doctor but find no relief. Then one day a pastor guides them through confession, forgiveness, and reconciliation and their neck, shoulders and chest immediately feel different. Josie's anguish was spiritual. She felt guilty that she was dying and would no longer be able to love, care for, and look after her husband and daughters. Pastor Mac empathised with her. He then reassured her. He then put his hands on her tense and agitated shoulders and gently but firmly pushed her writhing shoulders back onto the bed. He then asked Josie to look at him. With her eyes attentive to him, he recited Psalm 23 to her. And then he said-
You are one who is in God's care. You've been a wonderful wife and mother. You've been a good friend. And now it may be time to go and live in God's house for ever and ever and ever. Some day we're going to join you. Each of us." I named Josie's husband and their daughter. They're going to be there with you."
"Are you sure?" she asked.
"I'm sure," I said. "And I want you to know that everyone here loves you and is thankful to you. I want you to rest now and let God take you where he wants to lead you. Josie, don't be afraid."
"Are you sure it's okay to go, Pastor Mac?"
"Yes, I'm sure, Josie."
Then Josie did something I'll never forget. She looked away from me and spoke to her husband: "Thank you for being such a good husband to me." And to her daughter: "I love you; I'm so proud to be your mother." And then to the medical people: "Thank you for taking such good care of me." After a few words to each friend in the circle, she thanked me. Then Josie closed her eyes, sank into a calm sleep and, about an hour later, left our presence.
Josie went from anguish to peace by having her true condition attended to. She experienced in the last what I suspect we all crave, to die with the greatest dignity that comes from having a soul at peace with God and thereby at peace with others. Because of this her family at her bedside experienced a moment they would treasure for the rest of their lives.
Do you have a Pastor? Do you have peace for your soul?
Monday, 10 August 2009
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